Torn City Guides

Beginners Guide to Torn Gambling
Submitted by Smokapotamus007 [2141128] on 26/01/19 09:56:28 PM - Last editted on 26/01/19 11:08:46 PM

Welcome to Torn City and the Lucky Shot Casino! I will carefully guide you on how to WIN! Not LOSE! Torn $$$ by the "Transmutation of your Desire into Alternate Reality."

Every new player is warned not to lose all their money in the Casino... What's that mean though when you don't have any money? 

It is possible to go from Zero to Hero and become instant Meeeyuhn-Aires, even Beeeyuhn-Aires in the Lucky Shot....if you're lucky enough to win and smart enough to keep it. With this idea in mind let's outline some rules:

#1  Play responsibly and practice some good self discipline by setting limits!

#2  If you win big STOP and KEEP your winnings. Invest, buy stuff, but DO NOT get GREEDY! ChedBURN ,and our Lord and Savior, RN Geeezus will giveth but also taketh away!

#3 If you lose your allotted play money then QUIT! DO NOT sell all of your items, armor, weapons, stocks, property, etc to try and "win" your money back! Walk away! You WILL end up naked, homeless, and broke as a joke standing on the corner begging for your dinner....which you won't eat cuz you will probably gamble it away too!

#4 Most Import tip, trick, strategy, rule ...

JUST STAY OUT OF THE ****ING CASINO!!!

It's too easy to buy some Donator Packs and then lose your REAL money too 🙄 

 Lol 

Older players will say the same things, but you won't listen... So I'm going to tell you a story...

Before I was 30 days old I won $1 billion playing Slots on a "one off" $1 million dollar spin! :O The very next day I won $525 million playing blackjack... By the end of that week I had accumulated $2.11 BEEEYUHN Torn Bucks 🤑

Sadly, two months later, I had NEGATIVE $9 million, imaginary Torn Dollars... I lost everything and was naked, homeless and hungry. 

During the 2018 Hospital Competition... I mean Elimination Event... I won another $1 billion dollars over 3 days of playing Poker.... Then, I went to pay that pesky blackjack dealer a visit and "win" my money back... Riiiiiight... NEGATIVE $$$ again 🤦

In conclusion, STAY OWWWUHT!

Get your casino honors and merits, hopefully win a little coin, then just stick with $10 slot spins trying to hit the jackpot. Keno will eat your tokens super quick if u want them to be gone to make it easier to resist the urge to be stupid. One can also buy 75 cheap lottery tickets.

Russian Roulette is garbage unless, upon account creation RNGeesus annointed you a lucky bastard... otherwise you will just give your money to the annointed ones....if you do manage to make a few billion, FOR THE LOVE OF CHEDBURN! DO NOT go and bet ALL of it one game and lose....

Torn Poker is most assuredly NOT random cards, so be very careful until you get a good amount of hands/hours under your Torn Belt before trying to make your Torn Living grinding it out. Even if you play professionally in real life, be careful... You will quickly see that "more exciting" hands are all too common with more split pots than a gymnastics competition... More broken hearts than the 3rd floor Cardio Center at the Torn City Hospital...

Once you get the hang of Torn Poker you will find a small community of ppl who play regularly. Learn how they play and watch out for Bingo Allstars and ALWAYS be nice to the fish so they come back :D Always be gracious and kind when the whales blubber lol NEVER reraise Lord Jamie....if he bets or raises just fold like Alphan....😂😋😍

 TLDR:

STAY OUT OF THE CASINO...

WORK for your money... Respect it don't neglect it... Treat it don't beat it...

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