Updates

TimeDescription
July 16, 2019Honor updated: Semper Fortis
  • Description: 'Defeat someone more powerful than you' to 'Defeat someone who has more battle stats than you in a solo attack '
July 16, 2019Honor added: Manu Forte
  • Description: Defeat someone who has double your battle stats in a solo attack
July 12, 2019Item updated: Feathery Hotel Coupon
  • Description: 'A coupon to stay at one of the worlds best hotels, courtesy of the Feathery Hotels Group.' to 'A coupon to stay at one of the world's best hotels, courtesy of the Feathery Hotels Group.'
July 11, 2019Honor updated: Land Of Promise
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
July 10, 2019Honor updated: Ripped
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extremely Rare'
July 9, 2019Honor added: Ripped
  • Description: Attain 10,000,000,000 total stats
July 4, 2019Honor updated: Supernova
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
July 4, 2019Honor updated: Friendly Fire
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
July 3, 2019Honor updated: Friendly Fire
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
July 3, 2019Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '24500000' to '24300000'
July 2, 2019Honor added: Friendly Fire
  • Description: Defeat a fellow faction member
July 2, 2019Item updated: Handbag
  • Description: 'A platinum plated handbag to keep thieves at bay. Its diamond studs will deliver a nasty blow to any opponents. ' to 'A platinum plated handbag to keep thieves at bay. Its diamond studs will deliver a nasty blow to any opponent. '
June 27, 2019Item updated: Six Pack of Energy Drink
  • Description: 'Need a pick me up? This randomly chosen six-pack of assorted energy drinks will have you shaking with pure enthusiasm in five seconds flat. Munster, Red Cow or Tourine Elite could be waiting for you in this carefully curated collection of refreshing liquid vitality...as could a heart attack.' to 'Need a pick me up? This randomly chosen six-pack of assorted energy drinks will have you shaking with pure enthusiasm in five seconds flat. Munster, Red Cow or Taurine Elite could be waiting for you in this carefully curated collection of refreshing liquid vitality...as could a heart attack.'
June 26, 2019Honor updated: Shielded
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
June 25, 2019Item updated: Can of Taurine Elite
  • Name: 'Can of Tourine Elite' to 'Can of Taurine Elite'
June 25, 2019Honor added: Shielded
  • Description: Gain 1,000,000,000 defense
June 20, 2019Item updated: Glow Stick
  • Name: 'Glow stick' to 'Glow Stick'
June 19, 2019Honor updated: Hairy
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
June 19, 2019Honor updated: Backdrop
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Limited'
June 18, 2019Honor added: Backdrop
  • Description: Unlock a backdrop from the token shop
June 18, 2019Honor added: Hairy
  • Description: Unlock a hairstyle from the token shop
June 17, 2019Honor updated: Awesome
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
June 12, 2019Honor updated: Funambulist
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
June 11, 2019Honor added: Funambulist
  • Description: Gain 1,000,000,000 dexterity
June 10, 2019Honor updated: 1337
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
June 10, 2019Honor updated: Smuggler
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
June 7, 2019Item updated: Ladder
  • Type: 'Other' to 'Collectible'
June 7, 2019Item updated: Wire Cutters
  • Type: 'Other' to 'Collectible'
June 6, 2019Item added: Ladder
  • Description:
June 6, 2019Item added: Wire Cutters
  • Description:
June 6, 2019Item updated: Slingshot
  • Description: 'This weapon is perfect against a more powerful opponent, as used by David against Goliath.' to 'This weapon is perfect against a more powerful opponent, although contrary to popular opinion, it was a sling, not a slingshot, which was used by David against Goliath. Thank you to the ******* pedant who pointed this out.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Red Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +10 Nerve when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Yellow Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +$100,000 when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: White Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +5 Points when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Black Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides Crime Experience when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Brown Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +100 to random working stat when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Orange Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +50 Casino Tokens when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Pink Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides Experience when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Blue Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +250 Happiness when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Item updated: Green Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April, which provides +50 Energy when picked up. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special Gold Egg, an honor bar, and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
June 5, 2019Honor updated: Saintly
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
June 5, 2019Honor updated: Diabetic
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
June 5, 2019Honor updated: 1337
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extremely Rare'
June 4, 2019Honor added: 1337
  • Description: Deal exactly 1,337 damage to an opponent in a single hit
June 3, 2019Item added: Paint Mask
  • Description:
June 1, 2019Item updated: Stick Grenade
  • Description: 'Stick grenades are less powerful and have shorter fuses than their British counterparts, but weigh significantly less, making it easier to carry several into fights.' to 'Stick grenades are less powerful and have shorter fuses than their British counterparts, but weigh significantly less.'
May 30, 2019Honor updated: Smuggler
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
May 30, 2019Item updated: CD Player
  • Description: 'This stylish Sony Discman lets you take your background music wherever you go.' to 'This stylish home stereo system was top of the range back in 1994, with its CD player capable of reading even the most scratched up compact discs in your collection.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Plain Silver Ring
  • Description: 'A simple silver ring. Can be used to propose with.' to 'A simple silver ring.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Sapphire Ring
  • Description: 'A sapphire ring. Can be used to propose with.' to 'A sapphire ring.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Gold Ring
  • Description: 'A solid gold ring. Can be used to propose with.' to 'A solid gold ring.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Diamond Ring
  • Description: 'An expensive diamond ring. Can be used to propose with.' to 'An expensive diamond ring.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Xbox 360
  • Description: 'Want to play Xbox live?' to 'A games console used for playing games.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '24700000' to '24500000'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Brawn Over Brains
  • Description: 'Have you ever worn a tight-fitting vest top only to realise you look like Tom Hanks at the end of Philadelphia? Worry no more, as this helpful collection of workout tips will help to increase your strength and have you lifting heavy things like a big boy in no time. With over 5,000 revolutionary exercises, including "Deaf Guy Deadlifts", "Paralyser Pushups" and "Soil Yourself Squats", you'll become the man or manly-looking woman you always wanted to be.

    Effect: Increases strength by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Have you ever worn a tight-fitting vest top only to realise you look like Tom Hanks at the end of Philadelphia? Worry no more, as this helpful collection of workout tips will help to increase your strength and have you lifting heavy things like a big boy in no time. With over 5,000 revolutionary exercises, including "Deaf Guy Deadlifts", "Paralyser Pushups" and "Soil Yourself Squats", you'll become the man or manly-looking woman you always wanted to be.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Time Is In The Mind
  • Description: 'Time is a metaphysical concept whose values change according to the unique perception of every individual human. A romantic moment with a partner can whizz by in mere moments, whereas listening to the dull stories told by an elderly relative can feel like a lifetime. Using a variety of psychological techniques Time Is In The Mind will help you react faster, enjoy moments longer, and punch people in the face before they even know what hit them. By utilising simple methods such as putting your wristwatch in the freezer, or making every gap between seconds on your wall clock twelve metres long, you will become a veritable master of chronology and come to possess almost superhuman reactive ability.

    Effect: Increases speed by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Time is a metaphysical concept whose values change according to the unique perception of every individual human. A romantic moment with a partner can whizz by in mere moments, whereas listening to the dull stories told by an elderly relative can feel like a lifetime. Using a variety of psychological techniques Time Is In The Mind will help you react faster, enjoy moments longer, and punch people in the face before they even know what hit them. By utilising simple methods such as putting your wristwatch in the freezer, or making every gap between seconds on your wall clock twelve metres long, you will become a veritable master of chronology and come to possess almost superhuman reactive ability.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Keeping Your Face Handsome
  • Description: 'Tom Cruise. Denzel Washington. Will Smith. What do they all have in common? No, they aren't all black, unless Tom Cruise is currently undergoing a reverse Michael Jackson. The answer of course is that they are all handsome movie stars. And do you know why? Because they never get punched in the face. Keeping Your Face Handsome is the book movie stars don't want you to see. With its unique insights into blocking, ducking and diving, you'll ensure your gorgeous mush continues to look lovely until the end of time.

    "I wish I'd read this book before my face got spazzed"
    - Sylvester Stallone.

    Effect: Increases defense by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Tom Cruise. Denzel Washington. Will Smith. What do they all have in common? No, they aren't all black, unless Tom Cruise is currently undergoing a reverse Michael Jackson. The answer of course is that they are all handsome movie stars. And do you know why? Because they never get punched in the face. Keeping Your Face Handsome is the book movie stars don't want you to see. With its unique insights into blocking, ducking and diving, you'll ensure your gorgeous mush continues to look lovely until the end of time.

    "I wish I'd read this book before my face got spazzed"
    - Sylvester Stallone.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : A Job For Your Hands
  • Description: 'Did you know that humans use less than 2% of their hands' potential? What if we could somehow unlock the other 204%? My name is Colette Branlette, and whilst on holiday in Peru I studied the mystical ways of the human phalanges for over three weeks. Our dextrous extremities offer so much more to the world than simply tapping on keyboards and touching ourselves. In my inspiring personal story I recant how I unlocked society's iron grip on my own two mitts, and in turn explored the dormant life-force which lay untapped within my people paws - and all through the power of extreme shadow puppetry.

    Effect: Increases dexterity by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Did you know that humans use less than 2% of their hands' potential? What if we could somehow unlock the other 204%? My name is Colette Branlette, and whilst on holiday in Peru I studied the mystical ways of the human phalanges for over three weeks. Our dextrous extremities offer so much more to the world than simply tapping on keyboards and touching ourselves. In my inspiring personal story I recant how I unlocked society's iron grip on my own two mitts, and in turn explored the dormant life-force which lay untapped within my people paws - and all through the power of extreme shadow puppetry.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Working 9 Til 5
  • Description: 'Dolly Parton is the world's favourite large-breasted country singer, unless you count Tim McGraw. But did you know that aside from being a platinum recording artist Ms Parton is also the brains behind a cutting-edge method of project management? This revolutionary scheme takes inspiration from Parton's 9 to 5 single, and fans of her mantra include Donald Trump, Flava Flav, and Bill Gates - the latter seeing an increase of over 400% in productivity since employing Ms Parton's methods at Microsoft. If you're sick of working 9 to 5, barely gettin' by, with all talkin' and no givin', then this book has the potential to change your life.

    "If I'd known of Ms Parton's methods when I first started, I probably wouldn't be dead"
    - Steve Jobs

    Effect: Increases all working stats by 5% up to 2,500 each upon completion' to 'Dolly Parton is the world's favourite large-breasted country singer, unless you count Tim McGraw. But did you know that aside from being a platinum recording artist Ms Parton is also the brains behind a cutting-edge method of project management? This revolutionary scheme takes inspiration from Parton's 9 to 5 single, and fans of her mantra include Donald Trump, Flava Flav, and Bill Gates - the latter seeing an increase of over 400% in productivity since employing Ms Parton's methods at Microsoft. If you're sick of working 9 to 5, barely gettin' by, with all talkin' and no givin', then this book has the potential to change your life.

    "If I'd known of Ms Parton's methods when I first started, I probably wouldn't be dead"
    - Steve Jobs'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Making Friends, Enemies, And Cakes
  • Description: 'In our modern digital world it can be hard to find new friends, and just as hard to find yourself a pure evil nemesis. With everyone too focused on their iPads, Netflix and terror atrocities we all find it hard to break through and make new acquaintances from time to time. But did you know you can make both friends and foes on the bus, simply by sniffing them? Our easy program of 328 simple steps means you'll acquire lifelong pals and mortal enemies with ease, and all in the time it takes for a stranger to say "What are you doing to my hair?"

    Effect: Increases blacklist & friend list capacity by 100 upon completion' to 'In our modern digital world it can be hard to find new friends, and just as hard to find yourself a pure evil nemesis. With everyone too focused on their iPads, Netflix and terror atrocities we all find it hard to break through and make new acquaintances from time to time. But did you know you can make both friends and foes on the bus, simply by sniffing them? Our easy program of 328 simple steps means you'll acquire lifelong pals and mortal enemies with ease, and all in the time it takes for a stranger to say "What are you doing to my hair?"'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : High School For Adults
  • Description: 'Many of us have regrets about our time in high school - how come I never stood up for myself, I wish I had kissed that girl, why didn't I tell the Principal about coach's after school massage lessons? But the thing most people wish they could change is their course of study. You might be stuck in a dead-end graphic design job wishing you'd studied French. Perhaps you toil away as a physicist but your real passion is interpretive dance. Or maybe you're a Physical Education teacher and you wish you'd actually been to school...like even just once. High School For Adults is the antidote to all of your educational errors, and contains a series of useful ideas which will help you retrain your brain for a whole new vocation or industry.

    "I was one of the best pediatric cancer specialists in the world, but curing sick children never gave me anything like the rush I get when I turn up to work at the strip club and let strange men put dollar bills down my buttcrack"
    - Dr Brandy Giggletits

    Effect: Provides a free merit reset upon completion' to 'Many of us have regrets about our time in high school - how come I never stood up for myself, I wish I had kissed that girl, why didn't I tell the Principal about coach's after school massage lessons? But the thing most people wish they could change is their course of study. You might be stuck in a dead-end graphic design job wishing you'd studied French. Perhaps you toil away as a physicist but your real passion is interpretive dance. Or maybe you're a Physical Education teacher and you wish you'd actually been to school...like even just once. High School For Adults is the antidote to all of your educational errors, and contains a series of useful ideas which will help you retrain your brain for a whole new vocation or industry.

    "I was one of the best pediatric cancer specialists in the world, but curing sick children never gave me anything like the rush I get when I turn up to work at the strip club and let strange men put dollar bills down my buttcrack"
    - Dr Brandy Giggletits'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Milk Yourself Sober
  • Description: 'The healing properties of milk have long been known to mankind, and those first intrepid perverts who dared to suckle on the teat of their bovine brethren unlocked a delicious creamy cave of medicinal wonder. Addiction is a terrible thing, but by replacing each of your daily meals with twelve glasses of milk you'll see those ketamine cravings and hashish hankerings disappear almost as if by magic. A treasure trove of milk stories and milk based recipes can also be found in this, a book described as "dangerously unscientific" by the National Medical Council.

    Effect: Removes a substantial amount of drug addiction upon completion' to 'The healing properties of milk have long been known to mankind, and those first intrepid perverts who dared to suckle on the teat of their bovine brethren unlocked a delicious creamy cave of medicinal wonder. Addiction is a terrible thing, but by replacing each of your daily meals with twelve glasses of milk you'll see those ketamine cravings and hashish hankerings disappear almost as if by magic. A treasure trove of milk stories and milk based recipes can also be found in this, a book described as "dangerously unscientific" by the National Medical Council.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Fight Like An Asshole
  • Description: 'The greatest fighters and warmongers in history - Sun Tzu, Napoleon, Hitler, Mike Tyson, Judge Judy - what do they all have in common? They were all gigantic ass-hats. It was Muhammed Ali who was once so eloquently quoted as saying "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee". Yet who amongst the animal kingdom is more of a dick than bees? Perhaps hyenas, but that's besides the point. To become a great fighter you must first become a great douchebag. In Fight Like An Asshole you will learn how to unleash your inner shithead, learning all manner of titty twisters, eye-gouges, and shin-kicks to the cock which will leave your enemy in a crumpled heap of tears and shame.

    Effect: Provides a passive 25% bonus to all stats for 31 days' to 'The greatest fighters and warmongers in history - Sun Tzu, Napoleon, Hitler, Mike Tyson, Judge Judy - what do they all have in common? They were all gigantic ass-hats. It was Muhammed Ali who was once so eloquently quoted as saying "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee". Yet who amongst the animal kingdom is more of a dick than bees? Perhaps hyenas, but that's besides the point. To become a great fighter you must first become a great douchebag. In Fight Like An Asshole you will learn how to unleash your inner shithead, learning all manner of titty twisters, eye-gouges, and shin-kicks to the cock which will leave your enemy in a crumpled heap of tears and shame.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Mind Over Matter
  • Description: 'Mind over matter - a saying we've all heard but what exactly does it mean?
    Dr Prahapeemanafaleshakorlanomatophitarplain believes that the human body can actually "think" itself strong. The award winning author of such books as Smell Yourself Thin, Bones Are A Social Construct and Bullying Children Makes Them Smart now brings you this in-depth guide as to how you can use the power of self-belief to increase your strength. (N.B. Dr Prahapeemanafaleshakorlanomatophitarplain makes no guarantees as to the success or longevity of his methods and you attempt these activities at your own risk)

    Effect: Provides a passive 100% bonus to Strength for 31 days' to 'Mind over matter - a saying we've all heard but what exactly does it mean?
    Dr Prahapeemanafaleshakorlanomatophitarplain believes that the human body can actually "think" itself strong. The award winning author of such books as Smell Yourself Thin, Bones Are A Social Construct and Bullying Children Makes Them Smart now brings you this in-depth guide as to how you can use the power of self-belief to increase your strength. (N.B. Dr Prahapeemanafaleshakorlanomatophitarplain makes no guarantees as to the success or longevity of his methods and you attempt these activities at your own risk)'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : No Shame No Pain
  • Description: 'In her 2015 essay on the human nervous system entitled Agony and Anxiety - Whaaaa? Professor Folangé Musketeer-Smith revealed a ground-breaking discovery regarding the human nervous system. After a series of experiments involving children subjected to severe amounts of emotional and physical agony, Professor Musketeer-Smith made the astonishing discovery that people who were embarrassed to a sufficiently high degree become entirely immune to pain. No Shame No Pain expands on the Professor's initial findings with a more detailed examination of the ways you can shame yourself and loved ones into an agony free existence.

    Effect: Provides a passive 100% bonus to Defense for 31 days' to 'In her 2015 essay on the human nervous system entitled Agony and Anxiety - Whaaaa? Professor Folangé Musketeer-Smith revealed a ground-breaking discovery regarding the human nervous system. After a series of experiments involving children subjected to severe amounts of emotional and physical agony, Professor Musketeer-Smith made the astonishing discovery that people who were embarrassed to a sufficiently high degree become entirely immune to pain. No Shame No Pain expands on the Professor's initial findings with a more detailed examination of the ways you can shame yourself and loved ones into an agony free existence.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Run Like The Wind
  • Description: 'There isn't a man, woman or child alive who hasn't at some point dreamed of winning the 100m Olympic Sprint with a record breaking time of 9.04 seconds. Many of us have of course tried to achieve such feats, only to be told we're "too old", "too slow", "too fat" and "not from Jamaica". But what if you could use your own personal jet-engine to help you run faster than anyone ever has before you? Run Like The Wind contains scientifically proven methods based on the principle of harnessing your own human flatulence in order to increase speed. Once you know the power your air biscuits can provide, we guarantee you'll never waste another one.

    "Disgusting"
    - Oprah Winfrey

    Effect: Provides a passive 100% bonus to Speed for 31 days' to 'There isn't a man, woman or child alive who hasn't at some point dreamed of winning the 100m Olympic Sprint with a record breaking time of 9.04 seconds. Many of us have of course tried to achieve such feats, only to be told we're "too old", "too slow", "too fat" and "not from Jamaica". But what if you could use your own personal jet-engine to help you run faster than anyone ever has before you? Run Like The Wind contains scientifically proven methods based on the principle of harnessing your own human flatulence in order to increase speed. Once you know the power your air biscuits can provide, we guarantee you'll never waste another one.

    "Disgusting"
    - Oprah Winfrey'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Weaseling Out Of Trouble
  • Description: 'When the world's animals are listed in order of danger a few familiar names make up the top five; sharks, hippos, lions, spiders, mosquitos. But each time one notable absentee invalidates such lists, and it shall be to his eternal detriment if mankind continues to ignore the ever-present threat of the Weasel. Weasels are known for their extreme dexterity and cunning, yet their passive nature means they rarely use their powers for evil. Those weasels which do turn against man often manage to weasel out of court cases, leading to far fewer prosecutions than you would expect or hope. The only way humanity can combat any future insurrection by Earth's weasel population is to adopt and utilise their methods. By reading Weaseling Out of Trouble, you might just save your life.

    Effect: Provides a passive 100% bonus to Dexterity for 31 days' to 'When the world's animals are listed in order of danger a few familiar names make up the top five; sharks, hippos, lions, spiders, mosquitos. But each time one notable absentee invalidates such lists, and it shall be to his eternal detriment if mankind continues to ignore the ever-present threat of the Weasel. Weasels are known for their extreme dexterity and cunning, yet their passive nature means they rarely use their powers for evil. Those weasels which do turn against man often manage to weasel out of court cases, leading to far fewer prosecutions than you would expect or hope. The only way humanity can combat any future insurrection by Earth's weasel population is to adopt and utilise their methods. By reading Weaseling Out of Trouble, you might just save your life.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Get Hard Or Go Home
  • Description: 'Fast cars, leather jackets, a horrible personality; men use all sorts of things to mask the fact that they're packing a flaccid little cocktail weenie down there. But we all know the best way to overcompensate for having genitals which resemble an outty belly button is to hit the gym hard. Super hard. So hard it doesn't even matter if someone finds you sobbing in a heap clutching your junk. It doesn't matter okay? It's what you do with it that counts. LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

    Effect: Increases all gym gains by 20% for 31 days' to 'Fast cars, leather jackets, a horrible personality; men use all sorts of things to mask the fact that they're packing a flaccid little cocktail weenie down there. But we all know the best way to overcompensate for having genitals which resemble an outty belly button is to hit the gym hard. Super hard. So hard it doesn't even matter if someone finds you sobbing in a heap clutching your junk. It doesn't matter okay? It's what you do with it that counts. LEAVE ME ALONE!!!'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Gym Grunting - Shouting To Success
  • Description: 'World famous documentarian Alan Cucumber documents the athletic regimen of tennis legend Serena Williams in a bid to uncover why her on-court grunting regime has brought her so much success. Following Ms Williams over a single calendar year, Cucumber discovers Serena's specific method of grunting and how it helps her in the gym, on the tennis court, and in the bedroom. Sadly Alan Cucumber's eardrums were shattered by one particular grunt as Ms Williams attempted a 6am bicep curl, but the erstwhile storyteller perseveres and brings you the full, unedited story of his time with the multiple Grand Slam champion, in a book which the UK's Guardian newspaper described as "baffling".

    Effect: Increases Strength gym gains by 30% for 31 days' to 'World famous documentarian Alan Cucumber documents the athletic regimen of tennis legend Serena Williams in a bid to uncover why her on-court grunting regime has brought her so much success. Following Ms Williams over a single calendar year, Cucumber discovers Serena's specific method of grunting and how it helps her in the gym, on the tennis court, and in the bedroom. Sadly Alan Cucumber's eardrums were shattered by one particular grunt as Ms Williams attempted a 6am bicep curl, but the erstwhile storyteller perseveres and brings you the full, unedited story of his time with the multiple Grand Slam champion, in a book which the UK's Guardian newspaper described as "baffling".'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Self Defense In The Workplace
  • Description: 'An attack on an office can happen at any place, at any time...well obviously that place has to be an office, and it would also have to be open, but you get the point. If a masked intruder was to storm in and murder you at your desk, would you survive? Self Defense In The Workplace teaches you the skills you need to protect yourself in the event of workplace warfare. Find out how dangerous a trapper keeper can be with the right training. Discover how a single sheet of A4 paper can slice a man's throat clean open. And commit to memory the knowledge that someone armed with only six post-it notes, two B3 pencils and a scientific calculator can hold off a horde of over 200 heavily armed troops.

    Effect: Increases Defense gym gains by 30% for 31 days' to 'An attack on an office can happen at any place, at any time...well obviously that place has to be an office, and it would also have to be open, but you get the point. If a masked intruder was to storm in and murder you at your desk, would you survive? Self Defense In The Workplace teaches you the skills you need to protect yourself in the event of workplace warfare. Find out how dangerous a trapper keeper can be with the right training. Discover how a single sheet of A4 paper can slice a man's throat clean open. And commit to memory the knowledge that someone armed with only six post-it notes, two B3 pencils and a scientific calculator can hold off a horde of over 200 heavily armed troops.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Speed 3 - The Rejected Script
  • Description: 'Screenwriter and amateur gynaecologist Ricky Buttons finally reveals to the world the full shooting script for the cancelled third entry into the Speed franchise; Speed 3: Piggyback Ride. In this uniquely fascinating manuscript a young father agrees to give his seven year old daughter a piggyback ride, discovering to his horror that he must then travel faster than 40 miles per hour at all times to avoid seeing his little girl detonate before his very eyes. This romantic action comedy romp is both entertaining and inspiring, as we read with bemusement the various methods employed by the desperate dad to keep his legs perpetually in motion.

    Effect: Increases Speed gym gains by 30% for 31 days' to 'Screenwriter and amateur gynaecologist Ricky Buttons finally reveals to the world the full shooting script for the cancelled third entry into the Speed franchise; Speed 3: Piggyback Ride. In this uniquely fascinating manuscript a young father agrees to give his seven year old daughter a piggyback ride, discovering to his horror that he must then travel faster than 40 miles per hour at all times to avoid seeing his little girl detonate before his very eyes. This romantic action comedy romp is both entertaining and inspiring, as we read with bemusement the various methods employed by the desperate dad to keep his legs perpetually in motion.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Limbo Lovers 101
  • Description: 'The dexterity of one's spine has long been seen as an indication of their sexual prowess, and it is no coincidence that many of the greatest limbo champions were also spectacular in the bedroom. Margaret Headstone-Guff spent six years stalking and bedding some of the greatest pole-avoiders the world has ever seen, and during this time she absorbed many tips and tricks of the trade. Now this knowledge is passed on to you in this, a comprehensive guide to limbering yourself up real good, in a way which hopefully won't leave you paralysed.

    "After limbering myself up using the instructions in Limbo Lovers 101, I now eat and defecate through a tube"
    - The guy from Mumford & Sons

    Effect: Increases Dexterity gym gains by 30% for 31 days' to 'The dexterity of one's spine has long been seen as an indication of their sexual prowess, and it is no coincidence that many of the greatest limbo champions were also spectacular in the bedroom. Margaret Headstone-Guff spent six years stalking and bedding some of the greatest pole-avoiders the world has ever seen, and during this time she absorbed many tips and tricks of the trade. Now this knowledge is passed on to you in this, a comprehensive guide to limbering yourself up real good, in a way which hopefully won't leave you paralysed.

    "After limbering myself up using the instructions in Limbo Lovers 101, I now eat and defecate through a tube"
    - The guy from Mumford & Sons'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : The Hamburglar's Guide To Crime
  • Description: 'For three decades The Hamburglar's cheeky beef-stealing exploits were a mainstay of the McDonald's marketing campaign - until a brush with the law in 2003 put an end to both his career and his freedom. Embittered by a custody feud with his ex-wife, Birdie the Early Bird, The Hamburglar (real name Dennis Blork) was sent down for a 12 year stretch by Mayor McCheese after Officer Big Mac stumbled upon him desecrating the salad supplies at a nearby Burger King. But far from being the punishment intended, prison instead hardened The Hamburglar's criminal ways, giving him a range of crafty cons and terrible torture techniques courtesy of his fellow inmates. Now in this tell-all autobiography, The Hamburglar passes on his unique blend of criminal insight and erotic onion-based anecdotes in this The Hamburglar's Guide To Crime.

    "If I see you looking at me like that again I'll f**king cut you"
    - R. McDonald Esq

    Effect: Increases crime skill & crime experience gain by 25% for 31 days' to 'For three decades The Hamburglar's cheeky beef-stealing exploits were a mainstay of the McDonald's marketing campaign - until a brush with the law in 2003 put an end to both his career and his freedom. Embittered by a custody feud with his ex-wife, Birdie the Early Bird, The Hamburglar (real name Dennis Blork) was sent down for a 12 year stretch by Mayor McCheese after Officer Big Mac stumbled upon him desecrating the salad supplies at a nearby Burger King. But far from being the punishment intended, prison instead hardened The Hamburglar's criminal ways, giving him a range of crafty cons and terrible torture techniques courtesy of his fellow inmates. Now in this tell-all autobiography, The Hamburglar passes on his unique blend of criminal insight and erotic onion-based anecdotes in this The Hamburglar's Guide To Crime.

    "If I see you looking at me like that again I'll f**king cut you"
    - R. McDonald Esq'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : What Are Old Folk Good For Anyway?
  • Description: 'Society has long wondered what to do with the elderly - ignore them, burn them, use them as some kind of hat-stand. Many believe we should just put them in old people jail and leave them to rot, but to do these things would be a waste of the delicious knowledge retained inside the minds of our many wrinkled wanderers. In What Are Old Folk Good For Anyway? we examine how you can feast upon the experience inside old-people brains for your own benefit. From how to unlock a door using slippers through to a range of fascinating techniques for persuading someone to sleep with you out of pity - this book is an anthology of elderly experience no young whippersnapper can do without.

    Effect: Increases all EXP gain by 25% for 31 days' to 'Society has long wondered what to do with the elderly - ignore them, burn them, use them as some kind of hat-stand. Many believe we should just put them in old people jail and leave them to rot, but to do these things would be a waste of the delicious knowledge retained inside the minds of our many wrinkled wanderers. In What Are Old Folk Good For Anyway? we examine how you can feast upon the experience inside old-people brains for your own benefit. From how to unlock a door using slippers through to a range of fascinating techniques for persuading someone to sleep with you out of pity - this book is an anthology of elderly experience no young whippersnapper can do without.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Medical Degree Schmedical Degree
  • Description: 'Ever wonder how doctors know so much about your inside parts? Have you ever stopped to consider the possibility that they are wrong and you are right? We've all watched Grey's Anatomy, it can't be that hard. Hear the story of how I, Kenny Manchego, repeatedly leave hospitals against doctor's recommendations several days early, and how you can too!

    Effect: Decreases all hospital times by 50% for 31 days' to 'Ever wonder how doctors know so much about your inside parts? Have you ever stopped to consider the possibility that they are wrong and you are right? We've all watched Grey's Anatomy, it can't be that hard. Hear the story of how I, Kenny Manchego, repeatedly leave hospitals against doctor's recommendations several days early, and how you can too!'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : No More Soap On A Rope
  • Description: 'Humans have tattled on each other since the dawn of time. Many of us remember the first time we told mom it was the kid next door who shat on the porch. Tattling is what makes humans human, so let us rekindle this spirit and apply those tale-telling traits to the Torn legal system. This guide will help you discover how to rat on your fellow criminals so hard the judge can't help but go easy on you.

    Effect: Decreases all jail times by 50% for 31 days' to 'Humans have tattled on each other since the dawn of time. Many of us remember the first time we told mom it was the kid next door who shat on the porch. Tattling is what makes humans human, so let us rekindle this spirit and apply those tale-telling traits to the Torn legal system. This guide will help you discover how to rat on your fellow criminals so hard the judge can't help but go easy on you.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Mailing Yourself Abroad
  • Description: 'Ever wonder how mail seems to arrive so much faster at its destination than people do? Ervington Winterbottom did, so he decided to try something out. Over a period of three months he shipped 84 individually boxed kittens to various destinations across the country. On each occasion Winterbottom then attempted to arrive at his parcel's destination before his pussy packages using conventional public transport, and he failed every single time. Despite the unfortunate felines suffocating to death during each journey Ervington knew he had stumbled upon something life-changing, and to this day he saves thousands of pounds and hours every year shipping himself and his family to exotic destinations around the world. Mailing Yourself Abroad is the essential guide to cheap and easy international travel, and within minutes of reading it you'll be taping yourself up for the trip of a lifetime.

    Effect: Decreases all travel times by 25% for 31 days' to 'Ever wonder how mail seems to arrive so much faster at its destination than people do? Ervington Winterbottom did, so he decided to try something out. Over a period of three months he shipped 84 individually boxed kittens to various destinations across the country. On each occasion Winterbottom then attempted to arrive at his parcel's destination before his pussy packages using conventional public transport, and he failed every single time. Despite the unfortunate felines suffocating to death during each journey Ervington knew he had stumbled upon something life-changing, and to this day he saves thousands of pounds and hours every year shipping himself and his family to exotic destinations around the world. Mailing Yourself Abroad is the essential guide to cheap and easy international travel, and within minutes of reading it you'll be taping yourself up for the trip of a lifetime.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Smuggling For Beginners
  • Description: 'International smuggler Reynauld Le Cul has transported over 8,000 tonnes of illicit items between borders over his lifetime, and now as he approaches retirement he has decided to share this knowledge with the world. By building up from small frozen grapes Le Cul explains how to secrete items within yourself, gradually stretching the body's natural elasticated entrances until you are capable of smuggling a baby grand piano without the use of lubricant. Smuggling For Beginners also covers eluding sniffer dogs, how to ace a cavity search, and how it's possible to walk with twelve coke-filled pineapples inside your body without arousing suspicion.

    Effect: Increases travel items by 10 for 31 days' to 'International smuggler Reynauld Le Cul has transported over 8,000 tonnes of illicit items between borders over his lifetime, and now as he approaches retirement he has decided to share this knowledge with the world. By building up from small frozen grapes Le Cul explains how to secrete items within yourself, gradually stretching the body's natural elasticated entrances until you are capable of smuggling a baby grand piano without the use of lubricant. Smuggling For Beginners also covers eluding sniffer dogs, how to ace a cavity search, and how it's possible to walk with twelve coke-filled pineapples inside your body without arousing suspicion.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Stealthy Stealing of Underwear
  • Description: 'If Torn City was more like Tokyo and sold used underwear in vending machines then we wouldn't need a book like this, but it isn't, so we do. I, Miranda Gropenstein, have dedicated my life to stealing all manner of undergarments from people's homes and dumpsters. Filthy men's boxer shorts? You got it. Ladies' thongs. No problem. Crotchless hosiery from the washing basket of a 94 year old blind lady? You better believe it. And guess what, I've never been caught! Let me share with you my stealthy secrets, so you too can become what several newspapers have described as "A filthy-minded wrong-nonce".

    Effect: Guaranteed stealth for the next 31 days' to 'If Torn City was more like Tokyo and sold used underwear in vending machines then we wouldn't need a book like this, but it isn't, so we do. I, Miranda Gropenstein, have dedicated my life to stealing all manner of undergarments from people's homes and dumpsters. Filthy men's boxer shorts? You got it. Ladies' thongs. No problem. Crotchless hosiery from the washing basket of a 94 year old blind lady? You better believe it. And guess what, I've never been caught! Let me share with you my stealthy secrets, so you too can become what several newspapers have described as "A filthy-minded wrong-nonce".'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Shawshank Sure Ain't For Me!
  • Description: 'Since the release of The Shawshank Redemption, prison breakouts have become a little cliché. Every warden worth his salt now checks behind posters of cute girls for holes, under toilets for cracks in the floor, and at the end of sewerage pipes for excrement-slathered convicts. The old ways no longer work, so Shawshank Sure Ain't For Me! aims to "breakout" and devise a whole new approach to the traditional prison bust. From seducing the warden and dressing up like a Mexican bandido through to pleading insanity and gradually mailing yourself piece by piece to an alternate destination - this book is the go-to guide for both current convicts and potential lawbreakers alike.

    Effect: Large jail bust & escape boost for the next 31 days' to 'Since the release of The Shawshank Redemption, prison breakouts have become a little cliché. Every warden worth his salt now checks behind posters of cute girls for holes, under toilets for cracks in the floor, and at the end of sewerage pipes for excrement-slathered convicts. The old ways no longer work, so Shawshank Sure Ain't For Me! aims to "breakout" and devise a whole new approach to the traditional prison bust. From seducing the warden and dressing up like a Mexican bandido through to pleading insanity and gradually mailing yourself piece by piece to an alternate destination - this book is the go-to guide for both current convicts and potential lawbreakers alike.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Ignorance Is Bliss
  • Description: 'Happiness is the right of every human being, and the best way to achieve this is to pretend bad things don't happen. There is a reason stupid people always seem so giddy with excitement, and that's because their simple minds have no way of knowing what the hell is going on. We take inspiration from those kids in high school who sat at the back of the class eating paste and bring you some psychological tricks to turn that frown upside down. Has your Grandmother died recently? Burn those treasured family photos. Starving kids in Africa? Smash your TV into bits. People calling you dumb? Just straight up murder them with hammers. Our book is full of handy happiness hints suitable for children and adults alike. And if none of them work, our words are also printed on LSD blotter paper.

    Effect: Happiness can regenerate above maximum for 31 days' to 'Happiness is the right of every human being, and the best way to achieve this is to pretend bad things don't happen. There is a reason stupid people always seem so giddy with excitement, and that's because their simple minds have no way of knowing what the hell is going on. We take inspiration from those kids in high school who sat at the back of the class eating paste and bring you some psychological tricks to turn that frown upside down. Has your Grandmother died recently? Burn those treasured family photos. Starving kids in Africa? Smash your TV into bits. People calling you dumb? Just straight up murder them with hammers. Our book is full of handy happiness hints suitable for children and adults alike. And if none of them work, our words are also printed on LSD blotter paper.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Winking To Win
  • Description: 'There are many books on the art of persuasion, yet they all over-complicate what is essentially a very simple process. Making people give you more of what you want is as easy as two plus two, which if you didn't know equals four. Winking To Win teaches you how a simple wink of the right eye can double your fee in business negotiations instantly, and several winks in a row brings riches you can only dream of. Most people are too afraid to utilise the full power of the wink for fear it may make them resemble a pervert or stroke victim, yet those who truly understand the ways of the semi-blink will testify to its uniquely persuasive nature.

    "Since I started winking I haven't looked back, mostly because I over did it and my eyes fell out"
    - Stevie Wonder

    Effect: Doubles contract credit and money rewards for 31 days' to 'There are many books on the art of persuasion, yet they all over-complicate what is essentially a very simple process. Making people give you more of what you want is as easy as two plus two, which if you didn't know equals four. Winking To Win teaches you how a simple wink of the right eye can double your fee in business negotiations instantly, and several winks in a row brings riches you can only dream of. Most people are too afraid to utilise the full power of the wink for fear it may make them resemble a pervert or stroke victim, yet those who truly understand the ways of the semi-blink will testify to its uniquely persuasive nature.

    "Since I started winking I haven't looked back, mostly because I over did it and my eyes fell out"
    - Stevie Wonder'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Finders Keepers
  • Description: 'Why is it some people seem to get all the luck? One of your friends finds $50 on the floor, your mother acquires a briefcase full of jewels on the bus, and who hasn't got a best friend who just "happened" to stumble across a spare kidney in Taco Bell? I don't think this is luck at all. My name is D'aniel Bonkonovitch and in Finders Keepers I'll teach you how to make your own good fortune in this world of ours by simply re-classifying burglary, grand theft auto and pickpocketing as "aggressively opportunistic scavenging".

    Effect: Increases awareness by 2500% for 31 days' to 'Why is it some people seem to get all the luck? One of your friends finds $50 on the floor, your mother acquires a briefcase full of jewels on the bus, and who hasn't got a best friend who just "happened" to stumble across a spare kidney in Taco Bell? I don't think this is luck at all. My name is D'aniel Bonkonovitch and in Finders Keepers I'll teach you how to make your own good fortune in this world of ours by simply re-classifying burglary, grand theft auto and pickpocketing as "aggressively opportunistic scavenging".'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Hot Turkey
  • Description: 'Addiction is a cruel mistress and has blighted many people, but all of these tragically wasted lives could have been saved using one simple trick - denial. Both Alcoholics and Narcotics Anonymous claim the realisation of addiction is the first step towards recovery, but by delaying this crucial first step and recategorizing yourself as being "on the road to being on the road to recovery", you can enjoy one last month-long blowout before going cold turkey. In Hot Turkey we pose the questions drunk people are too wasted to ask. For example, giving in to your vice is often called "Falling off the Wagon", but how do we know the wagon is going in the right direction? Who is driving the wagon? Are there snacks on board? Maybe being on the wagon isn't all that great after all?

    Effect: Gain no drug addiction for 31 days' to 'Addiction is a cruel mistress and has blighted many people, but all of these tragically wasted lives could have been saved using one simple trick - denial. Both Alcoholics and Narcotics Anonymous claim the realisation of addiction is the first step towards recovery, but by delaying this crucial first step and recategorizing yourself as being "on the road to being on the road to recovery", you can enjoy one last month-long blowout before going cold turkey. In Hot Turkey we pose the questions drunk people are too wasted to ask. For example, giving in to your vice is often called "Falling off the Wagon", but how do we know the wagon is going in the right direction? Who is driving the wagon? Are there snacks on board? Maybe being on the wagon isn't all that great after all?'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Higher Daddy, Higher!
  • Description: 'The noble art of pushing children on swings has long been suggested as a potential solution to the world's energy crisis. For reasons as yet unknown, the mysterious power of a child screaming "Higher Daddy, Higher!" seems to generate an unlimited amount of energy from untapped reserves located deep within the human body. Higher Daddy, Higher examines this elusive source of raw brute force and seeks to apply its principles to everyday urban living.

    "I shouted 'higher daddy, higher!' whilst running for the subway, and I felt more energised than ever before in my life...until I was wrestled to the ground by police officers"
    - Judge Judy

    Effect: Provides +20% energy regeneration for 31 days' to 'The noble art of pushing children on swings has long been suggested as a potential solution to the world's energy crisis. For reasons as yet unknown, the mysterious power of a child screaming "Higher Daddy, Higher!" seems to generate an unlimited amount of energy from untapped reserves located deep within the human body. Higher Daddy, Higher examines this elusive source of raw brute force and seeks to apply its principles to everyday urban living.

    "I shouted 'higher daddy, higher!' whilst running for the subway, and I felt more energised than ever before in my life...until I was wrestled to the ground by police officers"
    - Judge Judy'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : The Real Dutch Courage
  • Description: 'During the Anglo-Dutch war of 1665-1667 the English sailors often remarked upon how brave their clog-wearing foes were in the heat of battle. The Dutch seemed to have complete disregard for their own safety, as was evident by their exclusive use of bicycles in a war fought entirely at sea. One man remarked that the Dutch must've been drunk, and it is from this incident the term "Dutch Courage" originates. Taking a drink before a stressful situation in order to stiffen one's resolve has long been referred to by this term, but The Real Dutch Courage seeks to obliterate this myth and reveal the true source of the Dutch sailors' bravery - the humble wasp. Each Dutchman took to battle a tiny wooden windmill filled with wasps affixed to their inner thigh as a method of encouragement, and the story of how this tradition came to pass truly is a tale for the ages.

    Effect: Doubles nerve regeneration for 31 days' to 'During the Anglo-Dutch war of 1665-1667 the English sailors often remarked upon how brave their clog-wearing foes were in the heat of battle. The Dutch seemed to have complete disregard for their own safety, as was evident by their exclusive use of bicycles in a war fought entirely at sea. One man remarked that the Dutch must've been drunk, and it is from this incident the term "Dutch Courage" originates. Taking a drink before a stressful situation in order to stiffen one's resolve has long been referred to by this term, but The Real Dutch Courage seeks to obliterate this myth and reveal the true source of the Dutch sailors' bravery - the humble wasp. Each Dutchman took to battle a tiny wooden windmill filled with wasps affixed to their inner thigh as a method of encouragement, and the story of how this tradition came to pass truly is a tale for the ages.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Because I'm Happy - The Pharrell Story
  • Description: 'The popular musician and producer Pharrell Williams has long suffered from a debilitating mental condition which causes him to smile at all times, regardless as to whether the situation calls for it. The "Happy" hitmaker is often seen grinning at road traffic accidents, laughing at unfortunate medical diagnoses, and seeming positively ecstatic when informed of the death of a close family friend. This condition was caused by a blow to the head suffered when a 6 year old Pharrell was hit by an ice cream truck whilst walking his dog. However, when the young RnB sensation awoke to find his canine companion had passed away after gorging itself on chocolate snow-cones spilled during the accident, he found the news so funny he became unable to shed tears ever again. This inspiring unauthorised biography of Pharrell Williams is a must read for anyone who needs something to stare at while taking a dump.

    Effect: Doubles happiness regeneration for 31 days' to 'The popular musician and producer Pharrell Williams has long suffered from a debilitating mental condition which causes him to smile at all times, regardless as to whether the situation calls for it. The "Happy" hitmaker is often seen grinning at road traffic accidents, laughing at unfortunate medical diagnoses, and seeming positively ecstatic when informed of the death of a close family friend. This condition was caused by a blow to the head suffered when a 6 year old Pharrell was hit by an ice cream truck whilst walking his dog. However, when the young RnB sensation awoke to find his canine companion had passed away after gorging itself on chocolate snow-cones spilled during the accident, he found the news so funny he became unable to shed tears ever again. This inspiring unauthorised biography of Pharrell Williams is a must read for anyone who needs something to stare at while taking a dump.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : No More Sick Days
  • Description: 'Traditional medicine has long been established as the one and only method of healing the sick, but did Jesus have access to aspirin and cough syrup when he cured the lepers? Historians say no, so how could he possibly achieve both this and the growth of such a long, lustrous beard? At the Medicinal Institute for Non-Derivative Life Extending Support Systems we work with homeopaths, psychics, spiritual healers and other non-qualified individuals to create alternative medical products for the gullible folk of the 21st Century. Did we say gullible? We meant smart. Smart educated people who clearly know more than those idiots with their "medical qualifications", "years of training" and their "reasonable logic".

    Effect: Doubles life regeneration for 31 days' to 'Traditional medicine has long been established as the one and only method of healing the sick, but did Jesus have access to aspirin and cough syrup when he cured the lepers? Historians say no, so how could he possibly achieve both this and the growth of such a long, lustrous beard? At the Medicinal Institute for Non-Derivative Life Extending Support Systems we work with homeopaths, psychics, spiritual healers and other non-qualified individuals to create alternative medical products for the gullible folk of the 21st Century. Did we say gullible? We meant smart. Smart educated people who clearly know more than those idiots with their "medical qualifications", "years of training" and their "reasonable logic".'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Duke - My Story
  • Description: 'How you doin? I'm The Duke, and this is my story what I gone and wrote myself. Now if you wanna learn how to be a big-time honcho head like me you better sit down and read this, but don't go reading it on the john cause I don't wanna see that business! My book is full of stories about how people double crossed over me and I whacked em real hard, but they ain't put no pictures in like I said because they say Oprah won't read it if I do. If you wanna hear about how I grew up on the streets alone, how I became the biggest shark in a small duck pond of fish, and why I'm even more dangerous than those Balsamic State nutjobs over in the Middle Earth...then you better buy this book yeah? Good. I knew you'd agree.

    Effect: Duke will occasionally retaliate against your attackers for 31 days' to 'How you doin? I'm The Duke, and this is my story what I gone and wrote myself. Now if you wanna learn how to be a big-time honcho head like me you better sit down and read this, but don't go reading it on the john cause I don't wanna see that business! My book is full of stories about how people double crossed over me and I whacked em real hard, but they ain't put no pictures in like I said because they say Oprah won't read it if I do. If you wanna hear about how I grew up on the streets alone, how I became the biggest shark in a small duck pond of fish, and why I'm even more dangerous than those Balsamic State nutjobs over in the Middle Earth...then you better buy this book yeah? Good. I knew you'd agree.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Self Control Is For Losers
  • Description: 'How many beers do you think it's safe to drink in an hour? Four? Twelve? Forty twelve? What about cigars, cream cakes and breakfast burritos? Surely there's a limit right? Everything in moderation? Not if you're smart about it there isn't. My name is Hermando Ravioli, and my breakfast consists of deep-fried lard balls accompanied by a Champagne and human blood smoothie. But how can I eat this and still weigh only six stone? By tricking my body like a sucker that's how. Each morning I use visualisation techniques to convince my brain I've just completed a marathon, thereby increasing my metabolism and allowing me to fill my face with ever more crap. With Self Control is For Losers you too will learn my gluttonous secrets, and before long you'll be on your way to a well-earned heart attack.

    Effect: Decreases all consumable cooldowns by 50% for 31 days' to 'How many beers do you think it's safe to drink in an hour? Four? Twelve? Forty twelve? What about cigars, cream cakes and breakfast burritos? Surely there's a limit right? Everything in moderation? Not if you're smart about it there isn't. My name is Hermando Ravioli, and my breakfast consists of deep-fried lard balls accompanied by a Champagne and human blood smoothie. But how can I eat this and still weigh only six stone? By tricking my body like a sucker that's how. Each morning I use visualisation techniques to convince my brain I've just completed a marathon, thereby increasing my metabolism and allowing me to fill my face with ever more crap. With Self Control is For Losers you too will learn my gluttonous secrets, and before long you'll be on your way to a well-earned heart attack.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Going Back For More
  • Description: 'When the ordinary public uses non-prescription medication for headaches, stomach pain or genital warts they often pay close attention to the recommended dosage. If the packet says take two every 24 hours, you take two every 24 hours - unless you are attempting to kill yourself. But did you know that you can take two times, three times, or even twelve times the recommended dose of any medication and only suffer minor internal bleeding and blindness? Going Back For More lifts the lid on the "recommended dosage" conspiracy and gives you the inside track on exactly how much morphine, neumune and painkilling medication you can take before you realise "I may have gone too far".

    Effect: Decreases all medical cooldowns by 50% for 31 days' to 'When the ordinary public uses non-prescription medication for headaches, stomach pain or genital warts they often pay close attention to the recommended dosage. If the packet says take two every 24 hours, you take two every 24 hours - unless you are attempting to kill yourself. But did you know that you can take two times, three times, or even twelve times the recommended dose of any medication and only suffer minor internal bleeding and blindness? Going Back For More lifts the lid on the "recommended dosage" conspiracy and gives you the inside track on exactly how much morphine, neumune and painkilling medication you can take before you realise "I may have gone too far".'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Get Drunk And Lose Dignity
  • Description: 'Hollywood is littered with tales of tinseltown stars losing their minds in a haze of drunken debauchery, with Marlon Brando, Alec Guinness, Colin Farrell and Betty White all falling foul of the demon drink at one point or another. But one woman outstrips them all - Lindsay Lohan. The enchanting tale of the silver screen's hepatitis typhoon is brought to life in this exquisite anthology of crayon drawings and doodles. If you've always wanted to puke like a Hollywood starlet then this story will both inspire and disgust you, as you are taken on a veritable rollercoaster of booze, bitching, and blowjobs behind dumpsters.

    Effect: Doubles alcohol effects for 31 days' to 'Hollywood is littered with tales of tinseltown stars losing their minds in a haze of drunken debauchery, with Marlon Brando, Alec Guinness, Colin Farrell and Betty White all falling foul of the demon drink at one point or another. But one woman outstrips them all - Lindsay Lohan. The enchanting tale of the silver screen's hepatitis typhoon is brought to life in this exquisite anthology of crayon drawings and doodles. If you've always wanted to puke like a Hollywood starlet then this story will both inspire and disgust you, as you are taken on a veritable rollercoaster of booze, bitching, and blowjobs behind dumpsters.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Fuelling Your Way To Failure
  • Description: 'In 1995 on a quiet walk through a forgettable city centre I met a man who would change my life. My name is Letitia Solid-Loaf and for years I had suffered with fatigue of both the mind and brain, until I bumped into a homeless man drinking petrol behind a KFC. He went by the name of Toxic Terry, and with his deep blue eyes and unruly mop of shaggy blonde hair he persuaded me to take a taste of his "cocktail" - which I later discovered was a simple energy drink mixed with petroleum. For the first time in my life I felt alive, and since this revelation I haven't gone more than three hours without combining an energy drink with harmful industrial propellants. Despite losing all of my hair, teeth, gums and dignity I do not regret a thing, and in Fuelling Your Way To Failure I offer up some of my favourite refuelling recipes for you to try at home, at school, or in a heavily soiled alleyway.

    Effect: Doubles energy drink effects for 31 days' to 'In 1995 on a quiet walk through a forgettable city centre I met a man who would change my life. My name is Letitia Solid-Loaf and for years I had suffered with fatigue of both the mind and brain, until I bumped into a homeless man drinking petrol behind a KFC. He went by the name of Toxic Terry, and with his deep blue eyes and unruly mop of shaggy blonde hair he persuaded me to take a taste of his "cocktail" - which I later discovered was a simple energy drink mixed with petroleum. For the first time in my life I felt alive, and since this revelation I haven't gone more than three hours without combining an energy drink with harmful industrial propellants. Despite losing all of my hair, teeth, gums and dignity I do not regret a thing, and in Fuelling Your Way To Failure I offer up some of my favourite refuelling recipes for you to try at home, at school, or in a heavily soiled alleyway.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Yes Please Diabetes
  • Description: 'If the tale of the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar tells us anything, it's that the morbidly obese eventually turn into a beautiful butterfly. Wouldn't you like to be that beautiful butterfly? Of course you would. This step by step guide will teach you the skills you need to become happier than ever as you consume nothing but candy and become a complete shut in within the comfort of your own home.

    Effect: Doubles candy effects for 31 days' to 'If the tale of the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar tells us anything, it's that the morbidly obese eventually turn into a beautiful butterfly. Wouldn't you like to be that beautiful butterfly? Of course you would. This step by step guide will teach you the skills you need to become happier than ever as you consume nothing but candy and become a complete shut in within the comfort of your own home.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Ugly Energy
  • Description: 'If there's one thing ugly people are known for it's their enthusiasm - because when you have a face that looks like you've fallen out of the ugly tree, been dragged through the whole hideous forest, chopped down by a grotesque lumber corporation and fashioned into the most vomit-inducing coffee table the world has ever seen...you've got to make a bit of an effort. In Ugly Energy we help you feel more energetic by teaching you how to disfigure your own face using nothing but a screwdriver, two tubs of mayonnaise and an industrial belt sander. And once you've messed up those stunning looks of yours, you'll begin to massively overcompensate and release the true power locked behind that one gorgeous mush.

    "I used to be pretty, but now I do stuff instead...literally all the stuff"
    - Lady Gaga

    Effect: Increases maximum energy to 250 for 31 days' to 'If there's one thing ugly people are known for it's their enthusiasm - because when you have a face that looks like you've fallen out of the ugly tree, been dragged through the whole hideous forest, chopped down by a grotesque lumber corporation and fashioned into the most vomit-inducing coffee table the world has ever seen...you've got to make a bit of an effort. In Ugly Energy we help you feel more energetic by teaching you how to disfigure your own face using nothing but a screwdriver, two tubs of mayonnaise and an industrial belt sander. And once you've messed up those stunning looks of yours, you'll begin to massively overcompensate and release the true power locked behind that one gorgeous mush.

    "I used to be pretty, but now I do stuff instead...literally all the stuff"
    - Lady Gaga'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Memories And Mammaries
  • Description: 'Some people are blessed with a photographic memory, others possess a naturally advanced brain capacity - but what about the rest of us? During her teenage years, mathematician and convicted felon Jennifer Yellow-Hat noticed that her friends had an astounding ability to recall her words whenever she wore a bulky sweater. Conversely, on days where her cleavage was on display, her associates' efforts to memorise facts and figures failed repeatedly. Her conclusion that the presence of breasts reduces the human mind's capacity for memory helped one Harvard student to a 100% grade on his advanced physics paper, and in Memories and Mammaries Ms Yellow-Hat explains how you too can improve information retention with three simple boob banishing techniques.

    "What's my name again? Who are you? What am I doing here?"
    - Hugh Hefner

    Effect: Takes the same effect from the last used book for 31 days' to 'Some people are blessed with a photographic memory, others possess a naturally advanced brain capacity - but what about the rest of us? During her teenage years, mathematician and convicted felon Jennifer Yellow-Hat noticed that her friends had an astounding ability to recall her words whenever she wore a bulky sweater. Conversely, on days where her cleavage was on display, her associates' efforts to memorise facts and figures failed repeatedly. Her conclusion that the presence of breasts reduces the human mind's capacity for memory helped one Harvard student to a 100% grade on his advanced physics paper, and in Memories and Mammaries Ms Yellow-Hat explains how you too can improve information retention with three simple boob banishing techniques.

    "What's my name again? Who are you? What am I doing here?"
    - Hugh Hefner'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Brown-nosing The Boss
  • Description: 'The term "brown-nosing" refers to the behavior of an employee attempting to curry favor with their superior or superiors. It was first coined by the Roman Emperor Tiberius, whose appointed counsel frequently cleansed their leader's unvarnished penny as an act of worship and servitude. Obviously such techniques are inappropriate today, but what modern equivalents can an employee use to increase their workplace reputation? With step-by-step guides to everything from incisive compliments through to impromptu massage at the urinals, Brown-nosing The Boss is the most important career-progression tool you will ever need.

    Effect: Greatly increases personal employee effectiveness for 31 days' to 'The term "brown-nosing" refers to the behavior of an employee attempting to curry favor with their superior or superiors. It was first coined by the Roman Emperor Tiberius, whose appointed counsel frequently cleansed their leader's unvarnished penny as an act of worship and servitude. Obviously such techniques are inappropriate today, but what modern equivalents can an employee use to increase their workplace reputation? With step-by-step guides to everything from incisive compliments through to impromptu massage at the urinals, Brown-nosing The Boss is the most important career-progression tool you will ever need.'
May 29, 2019Item updated: Book : Running Away From Trouble
  • Description: 'Some of Torn's most respected cowards draw upon a lifetime's experience of running from scary shit to offer an eye-opening glimpse into the world of the namby pamby wuss. In this guide you'll find strategies and stories, none of which are heroic, which you can use to inspire yourself to run screaming like a little girl at the next sign of trouble.

    "A book so gutless we're surprised it's even got a spine"
    - The New York Times

    Effect: Guaranteed escape attempt success for 31 days' to 'Some of Torn's most respected cowards draw upon a lifetime's experience of running from scary shit to offer an eye-opening glimpse into the world of the namby pamby wuss. In this guide you'll find strategies and stories, none of which are heroic, which you can use to inspire yourself to run screaming like a little girl at the next sign of trouble.

    "A book so gutless we're surprised it's even got a spine"
    - The New York Times'
May 29, 2019Honor updated: Smuggler
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
May 29, 2019Honor updated: Boss Fight
  • Description: 'Participate in the defeat of Duke' to 'Participate in the defeat of Duke or Leslie'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Rosary Beads
  • Description: 'If your god or gods still won't answer your prayers then these deity-tempting Rosary Beads are sure to get their attention. Made from the most sacred blend of polyurethane on the market, holding these in the palm of your hand will increase the effects of praying in the Church by 10%.' to 'If your god or gods still won't answer your prayers then these deity-tempting Rosary Beads are sure to get their attention. Made from the most sacred blend of polyurethane on the market, holding these in the palm of your hand will increase the effects of praying in the Church.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Bronze Microphone
  • Description: '' to 'Nobody remembers those who came in third place in any event ever, not even their families and friends. But this bronze microphone trophy will change that, given as it is to those who were deemed not good enough for second place in a Torn singing competition.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Silver Microphone
  • Description: '' to 'If you're second in the Olympic 100 metres this is often a temporary scenario, as you'll likely be bumped up to first ten years later when a random drug test eliminates the victor. We can't promise that will happen with Torn's singing competitions though, so you'll have to make do with this silver microphone trophy instead.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Gold Microphone
  • Description: '' to 'This ownership of this golden microphone trophy indicates that you have achieved one of two things; either you won a Torn singing competition due to your fantastic musical abilities, or you bought the trophy off the item market to pretend you've achieved something.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Wind Proof Lighter
  • Description: 'With a lifetime guarantee, this windproof lighter is a must have for the outdoor type. It features our patented flint-wheel ignition and extra thick side walls to take those hard knocks. This lighter is also refillable with butane gas and gives off a beautiful blue flame. Improves success rate for the Arson crime.' to 'With a lifetime guarantee, this windproof lighter is a must have for the outdoor type. It features our patented flint-wheel ignition and extra thick side walls to take those hard knocks. This lighter is also refillable with butane gas and gives off a beautiful blue flame.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Pair of Glasses
  • Description: 'A pair of high quality designer spectacles. Soft adjustable nose pads and plastic arm tips help to create a comfortable fit. These frames also make very cool sunglasses for men and women. Improves success rate for the Search for cash crime.' to 'A pair of high quality designer spectacles. Soft adjustable nose pads and plastic arm tips help to create a comfortable fit. These frames also make very cool sunglasses for men and women.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: High-Speed Drive
  • Description: 'This state-of-the-art CD drive can burn CDs faster than any other device on the market. Perfect for creating large volumes of high quality backups. Improves success rate for the Sell copied media crime.' to 'This state-of-the-art CD drive can burn CDs faster than any other device on the market. Perfect for creating large volumes of high quality backups.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Mountain Bike
  • Description: 'The Mountain Bike is a high spec bicycle created for off-road cycling. This high-performance bike has an aluminium dual suspension frame, alloy linear pull brakes and 24 speed gears. Perfect for quick shopping runs in the city. Improves success rate for the Shoplift crime.' to 'The Mountain Bike is a high spec bicycle created for off-road cycling. This high-performance bike has an aluminium dual suspension frame, alloy linear pull brakes and 24 speed gears. Perfect for quick shopping runs in the city.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Cut-Throat Razor
  • Description: 'The Cut-Throat Razor is a razor with a blade that can fold into its handle. Once widely used, it has since been replaced by modern safety razors. However it is still a popular tool with pickpockets who use it to open victim's pockets and cut bag straps unnoticed. Improves success rate for the Pickpocket crime.' to 'The Cut-Throat Razor is a razor with a blade that can fold into its handle. Once widely used, it has since been replaced by modern safety razors. However it is still a popular tool with pickpockets who use it to open victim's pockets and cut bag straps unnoticed.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Slim Crowbar
  • Description: 'The Slim Crowbar is a tool used for forcing entry. It is smaller and lighter than an ordinary crowbar making it easy to conceal. It can pop windows and doors with the minimum of effort. Improves success rate for the Larceny crime.' to 'The Slim Crowbar is a tool used for forcing entry. It is smaller and lighter than an ordinary crowbar making it easy to conceal. It can pop windows and doors with the minimum of effort.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Balaclava
  • Description: 'The Ski Mask is a warm hat that covers the whole head. It has two eye holes for improved vision and a convenient mouth hole for barking orders at bank and convenience store staff. Improves success rate for the Armed Robbery crime.' to 'The Ski Mask is a warm hat that covers the whole head. It has two eye holes for improved vision and a convenient mouth hole for barking orders at bank and convenience store staff.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Advanced Driving Tactics Manual
  • Description: 'The Advanced Driving Tactics Book is a special manual used in training the FBI, MI5 and other government security departments. It details tried and tested methods for evading pursuers on public roads. This book is not available to the public. Improves success rate for the Transport drugs crime.' to 'The Advanced Driving Tactics Book is a special manual used in training the FBI, MI5 and other government security departments. It details tried and tested methods for evading pursuers on public roads. This book is not available to the public.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Ergonomic Keyboard
  • Description: 'This healthier alternative for standard keyboards greatly increases typing speed and lets you work for longer, more comfortably. It has been expertly crafted to allow you to work in a more natural position. Improves success rate for the Plant a computer virus crime.' to 'This healthier alternative for standard keyboards greatly increases typing speed and lets you work for longer, more comfortably. It has been expertly crafted to allow you to work in a more natural position.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Tracking Device
  • Description: 'The Tracking Device is a kit that comprises a discreet, magnetic tracker and handheld GPS mapping system. It can track anyone or anything anywhere in the world to within 1 meter. Improves success rate for the Assassination crime.' to 'The Tracking Device is a kit that comprises a discreet, magnetic tracker and handheld GPS mapping system. It can track anyone or anything anywhere in the world to within 1 meter.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Screwdriver
  • Description: 'A strong flat-head screwdriver. With corrosion resistant, high grade chrome plated steel bars, the chance of tip breakage while shoving it in to a car ignition is extremely low. Improves success rate for the Grand Theft Auto crime.' to 'A strong flat-head screwdriver. With corrosion resistant, high grade chrome plated steel bars, the chance of tip breakage while shoving it in to a car ignition is extremely low.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Fanny Pack
  • Description: 'Problem solved! The bum bag is both comfortable and very fashionable to wear, while also keeping your personal belongings 100% secure as they are kept as close to you as possible. Perfect for storing and retrieving things on the fly! Improves success rate for the Pawn Shop crime.' to 'Problem solved! The bum bag is both comfortable and very fashionable to wear, while also keeping your personal belongings 100% secure as they are kept as close to you as possible. Perfect for storing and retrieving things on the fly!'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Tumble Dryer
  • Description: 'A condenser tumble dryer with a 10 kg capacity load. Use to dry clothes, or to make money, casino chips and credit cards look old and used - more realistic! Improves success rate for the Counterfeiting crime.' to 'A condenser tumble dryer with a 10 kg capacity load. Use to dry clothes, or to make money, casino chips and credit cards look old and used - more realistic!'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Chloroform
  • Description: 'Made by creating a chain reaction involving highly reactive chemicals, this strong smelling substance is sure to keep your kidnap victims quiet while you negotiate ransoms. Improves success rate for the Kidnapping crime.' to 'Made by creating a chain reaction involving highly reactive chemicals, this strong smelling substance is sure to keep your kidnap victims quiet while you negotiate ransoms.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Heavy Duty Padlock
  • Description: 'This weatherproof high security padlock is great for securing the back of big rigs to prevent the cargo from being stolen, the cops won't even bother with it if they stop you! Improves success rate for the Arms Trafficking crime.' to 'This weatherproof high security padlock is great for securing the back of big rigs to prevent the cargo from being stolen, the cops won't even bother with it if they stop you!'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Duct Tape
  • Description: 'Bonds on rough and uneven surfaces with a strong bite, is 100% waterproof, has strong re-inforced backing, a rugged all-weather shell, double-thick adhesive and is perfect for sticking explosive material to pillars, surfaces or walls. Improves success rate for the Bombing crime.' to 'Bonds on rough and uneven surfaces with a strong bite, is 100% waterproof, has strong re-inforced backing, a rugged all-weather shell, double-thick adhesive and is perfect for sticking explosive material to pillars, surfaces or walls.'
May 28, 2019Item updated: Wireless Dongle
  • Description: 'Access the internet nearly anywhere! A very useful tool for getting close to unsecure networks and bank mainframes. Improves success rate for the Hacking crime.' to 'Access the internet nearly anywhere! A very useful tool for getting close to unsecure networks and bank mainframes.'
May 28, 2019Honor added: Smuggler
  • Description: Import 1,000 items from abroad
May 28, 2019Honor updated: Dividend
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 25, 2019Honor updated: Mastermind
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Baseball Cap
  • Description: '' to 'Wear it forwards to keep your head cool, wear it backwards to be even cooler. '
May 24, 2019Item updated: Bermudas
  • Description: '' to 'Some say these are named 'bermudas' because it's so easy to get lost in 'em. '
May 24, 2019Item updated: Blouse
  • Description: '' to 'A lovely, flattering garment for warmer days.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Boob Tube
  • Description: '' to 'The best choice of clothing, if you want to spend all day hoisting something up.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Bush Hat
  • Description: '' to 'It's said the mere presence of this hat makes crocs flee on sight.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Camisole
  • Description: '' to 'This versatile undershirt can be worn on its own to add some flirty flavor.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Capri Pants
  • Description: '' to 'Having a great shin day? Show them off with these pants.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Cardigan
  • Description: '' to 'For days that are neither hot nor cold, or when you don't want people to look at your butt.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Cork Hat
  • Description: '' to 'If you turn your head really fast, maybe you'll make some awesome music! Warning: this injures the eyes.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Crop Top
  • Description: '' to 'For whatever reason, you might decide that everyone needs to intimately get to know your gut. Wear this.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Fisherman Hat
  • Description: '' to 'This item gives +1 to Fishing skill but -1 to Seduction.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Gym Shorts
  • Description: '' to 'You don't just have to wear these to the gym, you can wear them anywhere you want! Isn't that cool?'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Halterneck
  • Description: '' to 'What, you're too good for sleeves?'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Raincoat
  • Description: '' to 'Contrary to popular belief, this coat was invented to protect from rain, not create it. '
May 24, 2019Item updated: Pantyhose
  • Description: '' to 'Wear this on your face for a stylish accessory to your robbery.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Pencil Skirt
  • Description: '' to 'Is it a pencil? Is it a skirt? It's actually neither. (Except it's a skirt.)'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Peplum Top
  • Description: '' to 'This shirt was designed as a dress for people who still wanted to wear pants. '
May 24, 2019Item updated: Polo Shirt
  • Description: '' to 'This casual sports shirt is sure to make people think you're a pretty cool guy.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Poncho
  • Description: '' to 'This stylish must-have is the perfect combination of airy and warm.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Puffer Vest
  • Description: '' to 'This handsome and authoritative vest is said to get people to respect your opinions 33% more. It also keeps your torso super warm!'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Mackintosh
  • Description: '' to 'Legally, you are still supposed to wear clothes underneath this. But this is Torn, so you do you.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Shorts
  • Description: '' to 'Like pants, but less.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Skirt
  • Description: '' to 'It's like a lampshade for people.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Turtleneck
  • Description: '' to 'This garment provides a handy built-in escape from awkward conversations.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Yoga Pants
  • Description: '' to 'Wear these if you want to do yoga, or if you want to remind people that you have a butt.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Chest Harness
  • Description: '' to 'If you can ever figure out how to get this thing on, you'll be the belle of the leather fetish ball.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Choker
  • Description: '' to 'Despite its name, this flattering neck accessory is surprisingly comfortable.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Fishnet Stockings
  • Description: '' to 'Aside from the occasional fish caught in them, this steamy alternative to pantyhose remains a fan favourite.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Knee-high Boots
  • Description: '' to 'If you were to wear these and enter a 'highest boots' competition, you would only lose out to thigh-highs.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Lingerie
  • Description: '' to 'It's really just a fancy word for underoos.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Mankini
  • Description: '' to 'Wear a mankini, but make sure you manscape first. Don't make me mansplain it to you.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Mini Skirt
  • Description: '' to 'The regular skirt's shorter, flirtier, smaller cousin.'
May 24, 2019Item updated: Nipple Tassels
  • Description: '' to 'Jump up and down so they go around and around and around and around!'
May 22, 2019Honor updated: Arrowshot
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
May 21, 2019Honor added: Arrowshot
  • Description: Gain 1,000,000,000 speed
May 18, 2019Honor updated: Modded
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
May 18, 2019Honor updated: Survivalist
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 16, 2019Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 15, 2019Honor updated: Modded
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extremely Rare'
May 14, 2019Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '25200000' to '24700000'
May 14, 2019Item added: Bowler Hat
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Fitted Shirt
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Bow Tie
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Neck Tie
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Waistcoat
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Blazer
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Suit Trousers
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Dress Shoes
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Smoking Jacket
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Monocle
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Bronze Microphone
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Silver Microphone
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Item added: Gold Microphone
  • Description:
May 14, 2019Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
May 14, 2019Honor added: Modded
  • Description: Equip two high-tier mods to a weapon
May 13, 2019Honor updated: Poker King
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
May 12, 2019Honor updated: Loan Shark
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 12, 2019Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 12, 2019Honor updated: Pious
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 11, 2019Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
May 10, 2019Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 9, 2019Honor updated: Maradona
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
May 9, 2019Honor updated: Saintly
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 8, 2019Honor updated: Saintly
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
May 8, 2019Honor updated: Well Built
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
May 7, 2019Honor added: Saintly
  • Description: Donate a total of $1,000,000 to the church
May 7, 2019Honor added: Well Built
  • Description: Gain 1,000,000,000 strength
May 6, 2019Honor updated: Boss Fight
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 3, 2019Honor updated: Foot Soldier
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
May 2, 2019Item updated: Mountain Bike
  • Description: 'The Mountain Bike is a high spec bicycle created for off-road cycling. This high-performance bike has an aluminium dual suspension frame, alloy linear pull breaks and 24 speed gears. Perfect for quick shopping runs in the city. Improves success rate for the Shoplift crime.' to 'The Mountain Bike is a high spec bicycle created for off-road cycling. This high-performance bike has an aluminium dual suspension frame, alloy linear pull brakes and 24 speed gears. Perfect for quick shopping runs in the city. Improves success rate for the Shoplift crime.'
May 2, 2019Honor updated: Pressure Point
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
April 28, 2019Honor updated: Chainer 3
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
April 27, 2019Honor updated: Supernova
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
April 26, 2019Honor updated: Acute
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 26, 2019Honor updated: Serenity
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 26, 2019Honor updated: Champion
  • Description: '' to 'Win a community event'
April 25, 2019Honor updated: Boss Fight
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
April 24, 2019Honor updated: Massacre
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
April 23, 2019Honor updated: Boss Fight
  • Description: 'Assist in the defeat of an NPC' to 'Participate in the defeat of Duke'
April 23, 2019Honor added: Boss Fight
  • Description: Assist in the defeat of an NPC
April 22, 2019Honor updated: Task Master
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
April 16, 2019Honor added: Honored
  • Description: Achieve 500 total awards
April 10, 2019Honor updated: Year Of The Dragon
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 10, 2019Honor updated: Foot Soldier
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
April 9, 2019Honor updated: 50 Cal
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 9, 2019Honor added: Foot Soldier
  • Description: Beat 10 unique opponents in Russian Roulette
April 6, 2019Honor updated: Turbocharged
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 5, 2019Honor updated: Foul Play
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
April 4, 2019Honor updated: Three's a Crowd
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
April 4, 2019Honor updated: Stinker
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
April 3, 2019Honor updated: Wise Guy
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Common'
April 3, 2019Honor updated: Wipeout
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
April 2, 2019Honor updated: Frequent Flyer
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
April 2, 2019Honor added: Wise Guy
  • Description: Complete 50 education courses
March 30, 2019Item updated: Book : Time Is In The Mind
  • Description: 'Time is a metaphysical concept whose values change according to the unique perception of every individual human. A romantic moment with a partner can whizz by in mere moments, whereas listening to the dull stories told by an elderly relative can feel like a lifetime. Using a variety of psychological techniques Time Is In The Mind will help you react faster, enjoy moments longer, and punch people in the face before they even know what hit them. By utilising simple methods such as putting your wristwatch in the freezer, or making every gap between seconds on your wall clock twelve metres long, you will become a veritable master of chronology and come to possess almost superhuman reactive ability.

    Effect: Increase speed by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Time is a metaphysical concept whose values change according to the unique perception of every individual human. A romantic moment with a partner can whizz by in mere moments, whereas listening to the dull stories told by an elderly relative can feel like a lifetime. Using a variety of psychological techniques Time Is In The Mind will help you react faster, enjoy moments longer, and punch people in the face before they even know what hit them. By utilising simple methods such as putting your wristwatch in the freezer, or making every gap between seconds on your wall clock twelve metres long, you will become a veritable master of chronology and come to possess almost superhuman reactive ability.

    Effect: Increases speed by 5% up to 10m after 31 days'
March 30, 2019Item updated: Book : Keeping Your Face Handsome
  • Description: 'Tom Cruise. Denzel Washington. Will Smith. What do they all have in common? No, they aren't all black, unless Tom Cruise is currently undergoing a reverse Michael Jackson. The answer of course is that they are all handsome movie stars. And do you know why? Because they never get punched in the face. Keeping Your Face Handsome is the book movie stars don't want you to see. With its unique insights into blocking, ducking and diving, you'll ensure your gorgeous mush continues to look lovely until the end of time.

    "I wish I'd read this book before my face got spazzed"
    - Sylvester Stallone.

    Effect: Increase defense by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Tom Cruise. Denzel Washington. Will Smith. What do they all have in common? No, they aren't all black, unless Tom Cruise is currently undergoing a reverse Michael Jackson. The answer of course is that they are all handsome movie stars. And do you know why? Because they never get punched in the face. Keeping Your Face Handsome is the book movie stars don't want you to see. With its unique insights into blocking, ducking and diving, you'll ensure your gorgeous mush continues to look lovely until the end of time.

    "I wish I'd read this book before my face got spazzed"
    - Sylvester Stallone.

    Effect: Increases defense by 5% up to 10m after 31 days'
March 30, 2019Item updated: Book : A Job For Your Hands
  • Description: 'Did you know that humans use less than 2% of their hands' potential? What if we could somehow unlock the other 204%? My name is Colette Branlette, and whilst on holiday in Peru I studied the mystical ways of the human phalanges for over three weeks. Our dextrous extremities offer so much more to the world than simply tapping on keyboards and touching ourselves. In my inspiring personal story I recant how I unlocked society's iron grip on my own two mitts, and in turn explored the dormant life-force which lay untapped within my people paws - and all through the power of extreme shadow puppetry.

    Effect: Increase dexterity by 5% up to 10m after 31 days' to 'Did you know that humans use less than 2% of their hands' potential? What if we could somehow unlock the other 204%? My name is Colette Branlette, and whilst on holiday in Peru I studied the mystical ways of the human phalanges for over three weeks. Our dextrous extremities offer so much more to the world than simply tapping on keyboards and touching ourselves. In my inspiring personal story I recant how I unlocked society's iron grip on my own two mitts, and in turn explored the dormant life-force which lay untapped within my people paws - and all through the power of extreme shadow puppetry.

    Effect: Increases dexterity by 5% up to 10m after 31 days'
March 28, 2019Honor updated: Mule
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
March 27, 2019Honor updated: Stinker
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
March 27, 2019Honor updated: Wipeout
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
March 27, 2019Honor updated: Foul Play
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
March 26, 2019Honor added: Stinker
  • Description: Successfully prank someone with Stink Bombs
March 26, 2019Honor added: Wipeout
  • Description: Successfully prank someone with Toilet Paper
March 26, 2019Honor added: Foul Play
  • Description: Successfully prank someone with Dog Poop
March 25, 2019Honor updated: Chainer 4
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
March 21, 2019Item updated: High-Speed Drive
  • Name: 'High-Speed DVD Drive' to 'High-Speed Drive'
March 21, 2019Honor updated: Mule
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
March 20, 2019Honor updated: Mule
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
March 19, 2019Honor added: Mule
  • Description: Import 100 items from abroad
March 18, 2019Honor updated: Carnage
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
March 13, 2019Honor updated: Task Master
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
March 12, 2019Honor added: Task Master
  • Description: Earn 10,000 mission credits
March 11, 2019Honor updated: Pumped
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
March 7, 2019Honor updated: Pious
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
March 6, 2019Honor updated: Double Dragon
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
March 6, 2019Honor updated: Jacked
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
March 5, 2019Honor added: Jacked
  • Description: Attain 1,000,000,000 total stats
March 4, 2019Item updated: Bugatti Veyron
  • Sell price: '0' to '1800000'
March 3, 2019Honor updated: Energetic
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
March 1, 2019Honor updated: Decorated
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
February 28, 2019Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '25700000' to '25200000'
February 27, 2019Honor updated: Pious
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
February 26, 2019Item added: Chest Harness
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Choker
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Fishnet Stockings
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Knee-high Boots
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Lingerie
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Mankini
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Mini Skirt
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Item added: Nipple Tassels
  • Description:
February 26, 2019Honor added: Pious
  • Description: Donate a total of $100,000 to the church
February 22, 2019Honor updated: Decorated
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 20, 2019Honor updated: Decorated
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
February 19, 2019Honor added: Decorated
  • Description: Achieve 100 total awards
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Reinforced
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Lightspeed
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Alpinist
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Bulletproof
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Powerhouse
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Healthy
  • Rarity: 'Common' to 'Very Common'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Athletic
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Conditioned
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
February 18, 2019Honor updated: Fit
  • Rarity: 'Common' to 'Very Common'
February 16, 2019Honor updated: Vampire
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
February 14, 2019Item added: Pack of Blank CDs : 250
  • Description: Writable CDs for recording music or saving data.
February 14, 2019Item added: Pack of Blank CDs : 50
  • Description: Writable CDs for recording music or saving data.
February 14, 2019Item updated: Pack of Blank CDs : 100
  • Name: 'Pack of Blank CDs' to 'Pack of Blank CDs : 100'
February 14, 2019Honor updated: Pumped
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 13, 2019Honor updated: Pumped
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
February 12, 2019Item updated: Spray Can : Black
  • Type: 'Collectible' to 'Other'
February 12, 2019Honor added: Pumped
  • Description: Attain 100,000,000 total stats
February 12, 2019Honor updated: Toned
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Common'
February 11, 2019Honor updated: Forgiven
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 6, 2019Item updated: Tyrosine
  • Description: 'Tyrosine acts as a mental alertness booster by synthesising itself into dopamine; a compound which improves the transport of messages between nerve cells and neurons. Tests on animals have been shown that Tyrosine can make the animal less moody and far more alert. When used in combat, this booster will provide a massive bonus to dexterity.' to 'Tyrosine acts as a mental alertness booster by synthesising itself into dopamine; a compound which improves the transport of messages between nerve cells and neurons. Tests on animals show that Tyrosine can have an effect on mood and alertness. When used in combat, this booster will provide a massive bonus to dexterity.'
February 6, 2019Honor updated: Globetrotter
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
February 5, 2019Honor added: Globetrotter
  • Description: Spend 365 days in the air
February 4, 2019Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '26300000' to '25700000'
February 4, 2019Honor updated: Ecstatic
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
February 3, 2019Honor updated: Mighty Roar
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
February 1, 2019Item updated: Empty Box
  • Description: 'An empty box. Items can be placed in to this box turning it in to a parcel. It can then be sent to other people.' to 'An empty box. Items can be placed in to this box turning it into a parcel. It can then be sent to other people.'
February 1, 2019Item updated: Birthday Wrapping Paper
  • Description: 'A roll of expensive birthday wrapping paper. Can be used on a parcel to turn it in to a birthday present.' to 'A roll of expensive birthday wrapping paper. Can be used on a parcel to turn it into a birthday present.'
February 1, 2019Item updated: Generic Wrapping Paper
  • Description: 'A roll of standard wrapping paper. Can be used on a parcel to turn it in to a present.' to 'A roll of standard wrapping paper. Can be used on a parcel to turn it into a present.'
January 31, 2019Honor updated: Twenty-One
  • Description: 'Win a Natural, Five card Charlie, Double down and Insurance on Blackjack' to 'Win a Natural, Six card Charlie, Double down and Insurance on Blackjack'
January 31, 2019Honor updated: Alpinist
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
January 31, 2019Honor updated: Mercenary
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
January 23, 2019Honor updated: Motorhead
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
January 23, 2019Honor updated: Clever Dick
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Very Common'
January 22, 2019Honor added: Clever Dick
  • Description: Complete 25 education courses
January 20, 2019Honor updated: Lean
  • Rarity: 'Common' to 'Very Common'
January 16, 2019Honor updated: Mercenary
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extremely Rare'
January 16, 2019Honor updated: Orange Camo
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
January 15, 2019Honor added: Mercenary
  • Description: Complete 1,000 contracts
January 14, 2019Item added: Bronze Racing Trophy
  • Description: This Bronze Racing Trophy is awarded to those who finish third in racing events. Finishing third is probably worse than finishing fourth, as not only did you not win, but you've been recognised for your failure to achieve even a runner-up spot.
January 14, 2019Item added: Silver Racing Trophy
  • Description: This Silver Racing Trophy is awarded to those who finish second in racing events. Having been so close to victory, this trophy is here to remind you of the glory you failed to achieve. May its presence forever haunt you.
January 14, 2019Item added: Gold Racing Trophy
  • Description: This Gold Racing Trophy is awarded to the winner of a Torn racing event. Ownership of this item marks you out as a true champion - unless you bought it, in which case you are quite possibly the biggest loser of all.
January 14, 2019Honor updated: Stumped
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
January 12, 2019Honor updated: Bar Breaker
  • Description: 'Make 1,000 busts' to 'Bust 1,000 people from the Torn City jail'
January 12, 2019Honor updated: Aiding And Abetting
  • Description: 'Make 2,500 busts' to 'Bust 2,500 people from the Torn City jail'
January 12, 2019Honor updated: Don't Drop It
  • Description: 'Make 10,000 busts' to 'Bust 10,000 people from the Torn City jail'
January 9, 2019Honor updated: Conditioned
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Limited'
January 8, 2019Honor added: Conditioned
  • Description: Attain 10,000,000 total stats
January 5, 2019Honor updated: Double Dragon
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
January 3, 2019Item updated: Undefined
  • Name: 'Travel Socks' to 'Undefined'
January 3, 2019Item updated: Raincoat
  • Name: 'Mackintosh' to 'Raincoat'
January 3, 2019Item updated: Mackintosh
  • Name: 'Raincoat' to 'Mackintosh'
January 3, 2019Item updated: Travel Socks
  • Description: '' to 'Keep your toes as warm and snuggly as your favourite handgun with these cozy travel socks.'
January 2, 2019Item added: Baseball Cap
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Bermudas
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Blouse
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Boob Tube
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Bush Hat
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Camisole
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Capri Pants
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Cardigan
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Cork Hat
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Crop Top
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Fisherman Hat
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Gym Shorts
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Halterneck
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Mackintosh
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Pantyhose
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Pencil Skirt
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Peplum Top
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Polo Shirt
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Poncho
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Puffer Vest
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Raincoat
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Shorts
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Skirt
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Travel Socks
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Turtleneck
  • Description:
January 2, 2019Item added: Yoga Pants
  • Description:
December 29, 2018Item updated: Pixie Sticks
  • Description: 'Small plastic tubes filled with flavoured sugar. Available in orange, raspberry, grape and strawberry. Provides a large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Small plastic tubes filled with flavoured sugar. Available in orange, raspberry, grape and strawberry. Provides a large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Beer
  • Description: 'Just the thing for when you're looking to kick back after a hard day in the City. Provides a small nerve increase when drank.' to 'Just the thing for when you're looking to kick back after a hard day in the City. Provides a small nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Champagne
  • Description: 'Celebrate an occasion or show your special someone just how much you care with this bottle of champagne. Imported from France. Provides a small nerve increase when drank.' to 'Celebrate an occasion or show your special someone just how much you care with this bottle of champagne. Imported from France. Provides a small nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Box of Sweet Hearts
  • Description: 'Fun filled heart shaped candies with messages for your loved ones. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Fun filled heart shaped candies with messages for your loved ones. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Chocolate Kisses
  • Description: 'Sweet candy kiss for the one you love. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Sweet candy kiss for the one you love. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Saké
  • Description: 'This is an alcoholic beverage much like wine, made from rice and drunk by Japanese for centuries. Sake is drunk before and after many Japanese events. Provides a small nerve increase when drank.' to 'This is an alcoholic beverage much like wine, made from rice and drunk by Japanese for centuries. Sake is drunk before and after many Japanese events. Provides a small nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Lollipop
  • Description: 'Tasty fruity candy lolly for lovers, friends, whiny noobs and spoilt brats alike to enjoy! Available in strawberry, blueberry, banana and chocolate flavours. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Tasty fruity candy lolly for lovers, friends, whiny noobs and spoilt brats alike to enjoy! Available in strawberry, blueberry, banana and chocolate flavours. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Tequila
  • Description: 'Full to begin with, empty at the end, be sure to bring one of these back from your holidays in Mexico. Provides a small nerve increase when drank.' to 'Full to begin with, empty at the end, be sure to bring one of these back from your holidays in Mexico. Provides a small nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Blue Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Green Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Red Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Yellow Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: White Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Black Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Gold Easter Egg
  • Description: 'The rarest of all Easter eggs. One can only claim one of these when turning in the nine others; Blue, Green, Red, Yellow, White, Black, Brown, Orange and Pink. Provides a very large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'The rarest of all Easter eggs. One can only claim one of these when turning in the nine others; Blue, Green, Red, Yellow, White, Black, Brown, Orange and Pink. Provides a very large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Candy Kisses
  • Description: 'Small tear shaped chocolate candies. Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Small tear shaped chocolate candies. Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Tootsie Rolls
  • Description: 'A pack of individually wrapped chewy candies with an assortment of flavours. Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A pack of individually wrapped chewy candies with an assortment of flavours. Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Chocolate Truffles
  • Description: 'With a chocolate ganache center coated in chocolate, nothing tastes better. Provides a large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'With a chocolate ganache center coated in chocolate, nothing tastes better. Provides a large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of Munster
  • Description: 'Wake up to a roaring monster. Provides a moderate energy increase when drank.' to 'Wake up to a roaring monster. Provides a moderate energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Pumpkin Brew
  • Description: 'Brewed with the finest pumpkins, the perfect alcoholic drink for Halloween. Provides a moderate nerve increase when drank.' to 'Brewed with the finest pumpkins, the perfect alcoholic drink for Halloween. Provides a moderate nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of Red Cow
  • Description: 'Red cows are rare, only after years of the cows eating the right mix of red roses and tulips can you produce this high protein milk. Provides a large energy increase when drank.' to 'Red cows are rare, only after years of the cows eating the right mix of red roses and tulips can you produce this high protein milk. Provides a large energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of Tourine Elite
  • Description: 'With its 250mg of caffeine per can, this drink is illegal in many countries worldwide. Provides a very large energy increase when drank.' to 'With its 250mg of caffeine per can, this drink is illegal in many countries worldwide. Provides a very large energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Stinky Swamp Punch
  • Description: 'This drink smells like a real swamp: you will need nerves of steel to down this puppy. Provides a very large nerve increase when drank.' to 'This drink smells like a real swamp: you will need nerves of steel to down this puppy. Provides a very large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Wicked Witch
  • Description: 'Forget the tequila with the worm ... try the cider with the frog leg floaters! Provides a large nerve increase when drank.' to 'Forget the tequila with the worm ... try the cider with the frog leg floaters! Provides a large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Kandy Kane
  • Description: 'This bottled drink is said to be a Santa favourite. Gives your nerve the boost it needs. Provides a moderate nerve increase when drank.' to 'This bottled drink is said to be a Santa favourite. Gives your nerve the boost it needs. Provides a moderate nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Minty Mayhem
  • Description: 'A bottle of this can create mayhem with your nerve. Boosting your nerve enough to take the edge off. Provides a large nerve increase when drank.' to 'A bottle of this can create mayhem with your nerve. Boosting your nerve enough to take the edge off. Provides a large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Mistletoe Madness
  • Description: 'One bottle of this is all it takes sometimes. Boost your nerve to the right level. Provides a very large nerve increase when drank.' to 'One bottle of this is all it takes sometimes. Boost your nerve to the right level. Provides a very large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of Santa Shooters
  • Description: 'A shot of Santa is sure to boost your energy. Provides a moderate energy increase when drank.' to 'A shot of Santa is sure to boost your energy. Provides a moderate energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of Rockstar Rudolph
  • Description: 'A can of this will keep you Rockin' around the Christmas tree all day! Provides a large energy increase when drank.' to 'A can of this will keep you Rockin' around the Christmas tree all day! Provides a large energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Can of X-MASS
  • Description: 'X-MASS! Giving you the MASS you need this Christmas. Provides a very large energy increase when drank.' to 'X-MASS! Giving you the MASS you need this Christmas. Provides a very large energy increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Reindeer Droppings
  • Description: 'That's right, by all appearances it's a bag of Reindeer droppings. Don't let the looks deceive you, these chocolate covered raisins will melt in your mouth and boost your happiness! Provides a large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'That's right, by all appearances it's a bag of Reindeer droppings. Don't let the looks deceive you, these chocolate covered raisins will melt in your mouth and boost your happiness! Provides a large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Brown Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Orange Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Pink Easter Egg
  • Description: 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A rare Easter egg that can only be found during the month of April. Trade in all nine Easter eggs for a special gold egg, an honor bar and some points! Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Jawbreaker
  • Description: 'This colossal 3 inch jawstopper has 15 different flavoured layers of tooth rotting goodness. Provides a large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'This colossal 3 inch jawstopper has 15 different flavoured layers of tooth rotting goodness. Provides a large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Sherbet
  • Description: 'This bag of sherbet provides you with that mouth tingling fizz that you've always been waiting for. Provides a large happiness increase when eaten.' to 'This bag of sherbet provides you with that mouth tingling fizz that you've always been waiting for. Provides a large happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Bloody Eyeballs
  • Description: 'Eye Candy Halloween style. Provides a moderate happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Eye Candy Halloween style. Provides a moderate happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Christmas Cocktail
  • Description: 'Torn's liquefied way of wishing you a Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year. Provides a large nerve increase when drank.' to 'Torn's liquefied way of wishing you a Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year. Provides a large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Glass of Beer
  • Description: 'Only savages drink beer straight out of the bottle. This glass of beer is obtained fresh from the keg, and provides the same level of drunken joy as you'd get from a regular bottle of suds. Provides a moderate nerve increase when drank.' to 'Only savages drink beer straight out of the bottle. This glass of beer is obtained fresh from the keg, and provides the same level of drunken joy as you'd get from a regular bottle of suds. Provides a moderate nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Green Stout
  • Description: 'Consisting of nothing more than a glug of Irish stout and copious amounts of toxic green food colouring, this emerald-coloured beer will give you the supreme confidence of a drunk while also serving to clean out your colon in record time. Provides a very large nerve increase when drank.' to 'Consisting of nothing more than a glug of Irish stout and copious amounts of toxic green food colouring, this emerald-coloured beer will give you the supreme confidence of a drunk while also serving to clean out your colon in record time. Provides a very large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Christmas Spirit
  • Description: 'This Bottle of Christmas Spirit is guaranteed to get you in the mood to tell your relatives what you really think of them. Replete with flavours of pine, candy and turkey, this booze will leave you feeling so full you'll barely suffer a hangover at all. Provides a very large nerve increase when drank.' to 'This Bottle of Christmas Spirit is guaranteed to get you in the mood to tell your relatives what you really think of them. Replete with flavours of pine, candy and turkey, this booze will leave you feeling so full you'll barely suffer a hangover at all. Provides a very large nerve increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Honor updated: Talented
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Box of Chocolate Bars
  • Description: 'A box of Mars bars. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A box of Mars bars. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Big Box of Chocolate Bars
  • Description: 'A very large box of Mars bars. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A very large box of Mars bars. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Bag of Bon Bons
  • Description: 'A pack of Bon Bons. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A pack of Bon Bons. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Box of Bon Bons
  • Description: 'A box of four luxurious Bon Bons. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'A box of four luxurious Bon Bons. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 29, 2018Item updated: Box of Extra Strong Mints
  • Description: 'Wow, whoever needs these must have very bad breath. Provides a small happiness increase when eaten.' to 'Wow, whoever needs these must have very bad breath. Provides a small happiness increase when consumed.'
December 28, 2018Honor updated: Bulletproof
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
December 27, 2018Item updated: Amazon Doll
  • Description: 'Modelled after Wild_Irish_Btch, this doll shows that women can stomp your face into the ground while towering above the men of Torn City. Doll comes equipped with a bag of Cheetos, a Teddy Bear plushie, a replica of Brutus, and an avid love of midgets.' to 'Modeled after Wild_Irish_Btch, this doll shows that women can stomp your face into the ground while towering above the men of Torn City. Doll comes equipped with a bag of Cheetos, a Teddy Bear plushie, a replica of Brutus, and an avid love of midgets.'
December 27, 2018Honor added: Bulletproof
  • Description: Gain 100,000,000 defense
December 24, 2018Item updated: Gronch Mask '18
  • Description: 'Say hello to everyone's favourite festive villain, The Gronch! Legally distinct from other similar looking children’s characters, The Gronch hates Christmas so much he’ll knife anyone wearing an Xmas sweater. And now you too can follow in his bloody snowprints, by sporting this definitely non-copyright infringing Gronch Mask!' to 'Say hello to everyone's favourite festive villain, The Gronch! Legally distinct from other similar looking children's characters, The Gronch hates Christmas so much he'll knife anyone wearing an Xmas sweater. And now you too can follow in his bloody snowprints, by sporting this definitely non-copyright infringing Gronch Mask!'
December 21, 2018Item updated: Scammer in the Slammer '18
  • Description: 'You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf, well here comes Scammer in the Slammer! This 100% asbestos toy can be used to watch over your family and friends to prevent them from selling Snowboards as Skateboards and Vicodin for Xanax. Zachjuv, Perplex and Kapten beware, the Scammer in the Slammer is watching you!' to 'You've heard of Elf on the Shelf, well here comes Scammer in the Slammer! This 100% asbestos toy can be used to watch over your family and friends to prevent them from selling Snowboards as Skateboards and Vicodin for Xanax. Zachjuv, Perplex and Kapten beware, the Scammer in the Slammer is watching you!'
December 20, 2018Honor updated: Survivalist
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
December 19, 2018Honor updated: Motorhead
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
December 18, 2018Honor added: Motorhead
  • Description: Reach a racing skill of 10
December 17, 2018Honor updated: Pressure Point
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
December 14, 2018Honor updated: Fury
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
December 13, 2018Honor updated: KIA
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Rare'
December 12, 2018Honor updated: Seeker
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
December 12, 2018Honor updated: Clotted
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
December 12, 2018Honor updated: Fury
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
December 11, 2018Item added: Toast Jesus '18
  • Description: This piece of toast has been burnt in such a way that it seems to depict the face the Son of God. What a glorious miracle! This year, rather than turkey, why not consume our Lord and Savioury Jesus Christ on Christmas Day instead?
December 11, 2018Item added: Cheesus '18
  • Description: Forget Edam and Eve. They are nacho saviours. They will not boursin for you. But this Jesus-shaped Cheeto will. For this man is the Son of Gouda, Cheesus Christ. Camembert witness to his glorious legacy. Halloumi brie thy name.
December 11, 2018Item added: Bottle of Christmas Spirit
  • Description: This Bottle of Christmas Spirit is guaranteed to get you in the mood to tell your relatives what you really think of them. Replete with flavours of pine, candy and turkey, this booze will leave you feeling so full you'll barely suffer a hangover at all. Provides a very large nerve increase when drank.
December 11, 2018Item added: Scammer in the Slammer '18
  • Description: You’ve heard of Elf on the Shelf, well here comes Scammer in the Slammer! This 100% asbestos toy can be used to watch over your family and friends to prevent them from selling Snowboards as Skateboards and Vicodin for Xanax. Zachjuv, Perplex and Kapten beware, the Scammer in the Slammer is watching you!
December 11, 2018Item added: Gronch Mask '18
  • Description: Say hello to everyone's favourite festive villain, The Gronch! Legally distinct from other similar looking children’s characters, The Gronch hates Christmas so much he’ll knife anyone wearing an Xmas sweater. And now you too can follow in his bloody snowprints, by sporting this definitely non-copyright infringing Gronch Mask!
December 11, 2018Honor added: Fury
  • Description: Achieve 10,000 hits
December 9, 2018Honor updated: Serenity
  • Rarity: 'Uncommon' to 'Limited'
December 8, 2018Item updated: Birthday Cake '05
  • Description: 'Slice of birthday cake left over from the First Birthday of Torn City!!' to 'A slice of cake left over from Torn's first birthday.'
December 8, 2018Item updated: Fruitcake
  • Buy price: '0' to '30'
December 8, 2018Item updated: Staff Haxx Button
  • Description: 'For a long hard day at the office, when it seems like the help questions and forum reports will just not stop coming in. Never fear the Staff Haxx Button you always wanted is here. May the force be with you!' to 'For a long hard day at the office, when it seems like the help questions and forum reports will just not stop coming in. Never fear, the Staff Haxx Button you always wanted is here. May the force be with you!'
December 6, 2018Honor updated: Double Dragon
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
December 5, 2018Honor updated: Pressure Point
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Limited'
December 4, 2018Honor added: Pressure Point
  • Description: Achieve 100 one hit kills
December 2, 2018Honor updated: Optimist
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 30, 2018Honor updated: Freerunner
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 29, 2018Honor updated: Serenity
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
November 28, 2018Honor updated: Mastermind
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 28, 2018Honor updated: Double Dragon
  • Description: 'Achieve an assisted attack' to 'Assist in a single attack'
November 28, 2018Honor updated: Double Dragon
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
November 27, 2018Honor added: Double Dragon
  • Description: Achieve an assisted attack
November 27, 2018Honor updated: Shark Bait
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
November 26, 2018Honor updated: KIA
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 24, 2018Item updated: Flail
  • Name: 'Mace' to 'Flail'
November 23, 2018Item updated: Bottle of Saké
  • Name: 'Bottle of Sake' to 'Bottle of Saké'
November 23, 2018Honor updated: Dividend
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 22, 2018Honor updated: OP
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
November 21, 2018Item updated: Soup Nazi Doll
  • Description: 'Often seen running loose on IRC, usually before kicking rule breakers with the message No Soup For You!!Believed to have been released by Lestat.' to 'Often seen running loose on IRC, usually before kicking rule breakers with the message No Soup For You!! Believed to have been released by Lestat.'
November 21, 2018Honor updated: Dividend
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Rare'
November 20, 2018Honor updated: Red Camo
  • Rarity: 'Limited' to 'Uncommon'
November 20, 2018Honor added: Dividend
  • Description: Receive 100 stock payouts
November 19, 2018Item updated: Mouser Doll
  • Description: 'Similar to the one used by Mouser to relieve the stress of dealing with uncooperative staff, annoying n00bs and day to day business of being a Coder in Torn City.' to 'Similar to the one used by Mouser to relieve the stress of dealing with uncooperative staff, annoying n00bs, and day to day business of being a Coder in Torn City.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Locked Teddy
  • Description: 'This bear is covered in chains connected with padlocks. He has been seen locking forum topics around Torn City but has yet to have any of his locks picked.' to 'This bear is covered in chains connected with padlocks. He has been seen locking forum topics around Torn City, but has yet to have any of his locks picked.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Pouncer Doll
  • Description: 'Be careful of Pouncer. She might pounce on you unexpectedly or hit you with a pillow or ducks just like her creator SexySassy.' to 'Be careful of Pouncer. She might pounce on you unexpectedly, or hit you with a pillow or ducks, just like her creator SexySassy.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Spammer Doll
  • Description: 'A very friendly doll with good interaction until you make it mad can hit back pretty hard and starts spamming you even when you think it should be sleeping just like Templar.' to 'A very friendly doll with good interactions, until you make it mad. It can hit back pretty hard, and It will start spamming you, even when you think it should be sleeping, just like Templar.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Banana Phone
  • Description: 'Bright yellow and shaped like a banana and plays Titan's favourite song when it rings. Known to annoy other staff members... may be part of the reason he loves it.' to 'Bright yellow, shaped like a banana, and plays Titan's favourite song when it rings. Known to annoy other staff members... may be part of the reason he loves it.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: WarPaint Kit
  • Description: 'The perfect accessory when going off to war. Fashioned after Scarlet's own personal kit containing facial paints made of wolf's blood. Once applied the user is said to gain the prowess of the wolf.' to 'The perfect accessory when going off to war. Fashioned after Scarlet's own personal kit, containing facial paints made of wolf's blood. Once applied, the user is said to gain the prowess of the wolf.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Official Ninja Kit
  • Description: 'The Official Hiro Ninja Kit is a custom fit accessory set for any wannabe ninja. Contains: ninja suit for those stealthy attacks, grappling hook for those difficult larcenies, ninja guide book as penned by Hiro himself. Warning- Not for novices.' to 'The Official Hiro Ninja Kit is a custom fit accessory set for any wannabe ninja. Contains: ninja suit for those stealthy attacks, grappling hook for those difficult larcenies, ninja guide book as penned by Hiro himself. Warning - not for novices.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Bunch of Balloons '05
  • Description: 'Large bunch of brightly coloured balloons left over from the First Birthday of Torn City. How they stay inflated after the party's over no one will ever figure out.' to 'Large bunch of brightly coloured balloons left over from the First Birthday of Torn City. How they stay inflated after the party's over, no one will ever figure out.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Cookie Launcher
  • Description: 'A non-working replica of Mix's Cookie launcher used to launch cookies at his IRC buddies.' to 'A non-working replica of Mix's Cookie launcher, used to launch cookies at his IRC buddies.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Dollar Bill Collectible
  • Description: 'This item is so rare that only a few bills were printed. It can only be obtained on the item market during Dollar Day Sales. It costs one dollar to purchase but due to limited printing it is worth a small fortune' to 'This item is so rare that only a few bills were printed. It can only be obtained on the item market during Dollar Day Sales. It costs one dollar to purchase, but due to limited printing it is worth a small fortune.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Friendly Bot Guide
  • Description: 'Caspeh can be seen lurking around the many channels of IRC and this is your guide to all things bottish! Join and win with Caspeh during the famous Hamster give-aways or kick back and relax with some scrabble - the possibilities are endless with Caspeh's Friendly Bot Guide.' to 'Caspeh can be seen lurking around the many channels of IRC, and this is your guide to all things bottish! Join and win with Caspeh during the famous Hamster give-aways or kick back and relax with some scrabble - the possibilities are endless with Caspeh's Friendly Bot Guide.'
November 19, 2018Item updated: Brewery Key
  • Description: 'Grants the holder of the key unlimited access to the Guinness Brewery and also the amazing alcohol tolerance of the Irish.' to 'Grants the holder of the key unlimited access to the Guinness Brewery, and also the amazing alcohol tolerance of the Irish.'
November 15, 2018Honor updated: Lightspeed
  • Rarity: 'Extraordinary' to 'Rare'
November 14, 2018Honor updated: Lightspeed
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Extraordinary'
November 13, 2018Honor added: Lightspeed
  • Description: Gain 100,000,000 speed
November 11, 2018Honor updated: Flatline
  • Rarity: 'Common' to 'Very Common'
November 11, 2018Honor updated: Reinforced
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 10, 2018Honor updated: The Whole Nine Yards
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
November 10, 2018Honor updated: To The Limit
  • Rarity: 'Extremely Rare' to 'Extraordinary'
November 10, 2018Honor updated: Guardian Angel
  • Rarity: 'Rare' to 'Limited'
November 9, 2018Honor updated: Keen
  • Description: 'Spy on people 100 times' to 'Spy on people while in the army 100 times'
November 7, 2018Honor updated: Smart Alec
  • Rarity: 'Unknown Rarity' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Blood Money
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bar Breaker
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Aiding And Abetting
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Don't Drop It
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Society's Worst
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Freedom Isn't Free
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chainer 1
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Flatline
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chainer 2
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Carnage
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chainer 3
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The High Life
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Half Way There
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Survivor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Whole Nine Yards
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: To The Limit
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Energize
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Second Chance
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Wholesaler
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Spinner
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Deadlock
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Eco Friendly
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Shark Bait
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bargain Hunter
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Redline
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Jackpot
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lucky Break
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Departure
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Globally Effective
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Domination
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Supremacy
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Parallel
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Globule
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Electric Dream
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pepperoni
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Constellations
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Acute
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Resistance
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Retro
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Christmas in Torn
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Brainz
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Time Traveller
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Serenity
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Glimmer
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Forgiven
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Futurity
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Supernova
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Highs and Lows
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: One in Six
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Champion
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Twenty-One
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Clotted
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Protege
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Ecstatic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Energetic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Anaemic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Vampire
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Transfusion
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Awesome
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lame
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mediocre
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Trick or Treat
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Torniversary
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chainer 4
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chainer 5
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Massacre
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Genocide
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Semper Fortis
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Sidekick
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Reinforced
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Survivalist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Turbocharged
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Daddys New Shoes
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Unarmed
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Tireless
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Worth it
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Talented
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Tough
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Alcoholic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Diabetic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Sodaholic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bibliophile
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Tourist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mastermind
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: You've Got Some Nerve
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Frequent Flyer
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Buffed
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Guardian Angel
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: 10-Stack
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: OP
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Freerunner
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Powerhouse
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mighty Roar
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor added: Smart Alec
  • Description: Complete 10 education courses
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Healthy
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lean
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Athletic
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Fit
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Toned
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cuba
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Uruguay
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mexico
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Myanmar
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Netherlands
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: New Zealand
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Norway
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pakistan
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Philippines
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Poland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Portugal
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Russia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Saudi Arabia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Serbia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Singapore
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Slovakia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Slovenia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: South Africa
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: South Korea
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Spain
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Sweden
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Switzerland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Thailand
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Turkey
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: United Arab Emirates
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: United Kingdom
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Vietnam
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Wales
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Maradona
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cascado
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Land Of Promise
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Hula
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Rising Sun
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: British Pride
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cape Town
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Like The Celebs
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Year Of The Dragon
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Toronto
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Spray And Pray
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Stumped
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Axe Wound
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pin Puller
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lend A Hand
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Yours Says Replica...
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: 2800 Ft/S
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cartridge Packer
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Act Of Faith
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Stabbist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Slasher
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Two Halves Make A Hole
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Civil Offence
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Escobar
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Stroke Bringer
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: We Have A Breach
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: RDD
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Smile, You're On Camera
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Breaking And Entering
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Professional
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Joy Rider
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bug
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chasm
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Fascination
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Keen
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: There And Back
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Stairway To Heaven
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Velutinous
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Standard Bar
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Default
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: England
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Afghanistan
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Albania
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Andorra
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bahrain
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Barbados
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Belarus
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cambodia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Chile
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Colombia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Confederate
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Cyprus
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Former USSR
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Ghana
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Greenland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Haiti
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Iceland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Jamaica
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Jolly Roger
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Kazakhstan
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Kuwait
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Laos
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Morocco
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Nepal
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Nigeria
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Northern Ireland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Oman
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Palestine
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Peru
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Puerto Rico
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Qatar
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Gay Pride
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Romania
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Scotland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Sri Lanka
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Taiwan
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Tunisia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Ukraine
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: United Nations
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mission Accomplished
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Allure
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Jack Of All Trades
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Labyrinth
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Silicon Valley
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Two's Company
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Three's a Crowd
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Social Butterfly
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Affronted
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: KIA
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Good Friday
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Socialist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Proven Capacity
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Master Of One
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Purple Heart
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: 50 Cal
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: 007
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Seeker
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Domino Effect
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Discovery
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bounty Hunter
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bronze Belt
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Silver Belt
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Gold Belt
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Dead Or Alive
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Poker King
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Optimist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Middleman
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Behemoth
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Draco
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Phoenix
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Abaddon
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Web Of Perks
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Couch Potato
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pyramid Scheme
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: I'm Watching You
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Smokin' Barrels
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Moneybags
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: I'm a Real Doctor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Journalist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Find A Penny, Pick It Up
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Magical Veins
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Loan Shark
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Luxury Real Estate
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Green, Green Grass
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mile High Club
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pocket Money
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Beautiful City
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Slow Bomb
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extremely Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Kill Streaker 1
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Kill Streaker 2
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Kill Streaker 3
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Another Brick In The Wall
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Stock Analyst
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Precision
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Driving Elite
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Self Defense
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Florence Nightingale
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Fire Starter
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Candy Man
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Spaced Out
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Night Walker
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Machinist
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Who's Frank?
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Party Animal
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Horse Tranquilizer
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Acid Dream
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: The Fields Of Opium
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: I Think I See Dead People
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Crank It Up
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Angel Dust
  • Rarity: '' to 'Extraordinary'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Free Energy
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Painkiller
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Woodland Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Desert Storm Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Urban Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Arctic Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Very Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Fall Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Yellow Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Digital Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Red Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Blue Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Orange Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Pink Camo
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Zebra Skin
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Leopard Skin
  • Rarity: '' to 'Limited'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Tiger Skin
  • Rarity: '' to 'Rare'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Biology Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Business Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Combat Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: ICT Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Defense Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: General Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Fitness Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: History Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Law Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mathematics Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Uncommon'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Psychology Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Sports Bachelor
  • Rarity: '' to 'Common'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: United States
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Argentina
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Australia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Austria
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bangladesh
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Belgium
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bosnia & Herzegovina
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Brazil
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Brunei
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Bulgaria
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Canada
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: China
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Croatia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Czech
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Denmark
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Egypt
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: El Salvador
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Estonia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Finland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: France
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Germany
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Greece
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Guyana
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Hong Kong
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Hungary
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: India
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Indonesia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Iran
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Iraq
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Ireland
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Israel
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Italy
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Japan
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Latvia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lebanon
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Lithuania
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Malaysia
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Malta
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
November 6, 2018Honor updated: Mauritius
  • Rarity: '' to 'Unknown Rarity'
October 30, 2018Item updated: Egyptian Amulet
  • Description: 'These amulets, often in the form of a scarab beetle, were left in tombs as grave goods or given to people and the gods as presents. The Scarab, or 'Kheper' (which means "to transform"), was used in many of the pharaonic names. Pharaoh Amenhotep III was famous for his group of '5 scarabs'. This particluar amulet is made from fired clay.' to 'These amulets, often in the form of a scarab beetle, were left in tombs as grave goods or given to people and the gods as presents. The Scarab, or 'Kheper' (which means "to transform"), was used in many of the pharaonic names. Pharaoh Amenhotep III was famous for his group of '5 scarabs'. This particular amulet is made from fired clay.'
October 30, 2018Honor added: Athletic
  • Description: Attain 1,000,000 total stats
October 25, 2018Item updated: Fruitcake
  • Description: 'Everyone gets one of these, and no one wants it. Hard and stale, it makes a great weapon, though!' to 'Everyone gets one of these, and no one wants it. Hard and stale.'
October 23, 2018Item added: Halloween Basket
  • Description: This Halloween basket can be used to pilfer sweets, booze and energy drinks from your fellow trick or treaters. It is made from 100% Vinyl Chloride, a carcinogen which is known to leech toxic chemicals into liquids and foodstuffs.
October 23, 2018Item added: Michael Myers Mask '18
  • Description: Originally based on the face of William Shatner, this iconic mask was most famously worn by the villain of the Halloween movies, Michael Myers; a fictional murderer not to be confused with the real life guy who played Shrek.
October 23, 2018Honor added: Sodaholic
  • Description: Drink 500 cans of energy drink
October 19, 2018Item updated: Book : Ugly Energy
  • Description: 'If there's one thing ugly people are known for it's their enthusiasm - because when you have a face that looks like you've fallen out of the ugly tree, been dragged through the whole hideous forest, chopped down by a grotesque lumber corporation and fashioned into the most vomit-inducing coffee table the world has ever seen...you've got to make a bit of an effort. In Ugly Energy we help you feel more energetic by teaching you how to disfigure your own face using nothing but a screwdriver, two tubs of mayonnaise and an industrial belt sander. And once you've messed up those stunning looks of yours, you'll begin to massively overcompensate and release the true power locked behind that one gorgeous mush.

    "I used to be pretty, but now I do stuff instead...literally all the stuff"
    - Lady Gaga

    Effect: Increases maximum energy by 100 for 31 days' to 'If there's one thing ugly people are known for it's their enthusiasm - because when you have a face that looks like you've fallen out of the ugly tree, been dragged through the whole hideous forest, chopped down by a grotesque lumber corporation and fashioned into the most vomit-inducing coffee table the world has ever seen...you've got to make a bit of an effort. In Ugly Energy we help you feel more energetic by teaching you how to disfigure your own face using nothing but a screwdriver, two tubs of mayonnaise and an industrial belt sander. And once you've messed up those stunning looks of yours, you'll begin to massively overcompensate and release the true power locked behind that one gorgeous mush.

    "I used to be pretty, but now I do stuff instead...literally all the stuff"
    - Lady Gaga

    Effect: Increases maximum energy to 250 for 31 days'
October 16, 2018Honor added: Mighty Roar
  • Description: Gain 100,000,000 strength
October 15, 2018Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '26000000' to '26300000'
October 9, 2018Honor added: 10-Stack
  • Description: Increase a merit upgrade to its maximum
October 8, 2018Item updated: Donator Pack
  • Sell price: '25700000' to '26000000'
October 2, 2018Honor added: Toned
  • Description: Attain 100,000 total stats
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